#but i have so many comics already i am not doing one for this T-T

[mari-lair]

local trap master suck at their job

[san8ny]

Intermission

Ellie Williams <3

Synopsis: Ellie and you haven’t spoken since highschool, you two never really that close. One day, the all-star hits you up upon getting kicked out. You down to help her steal from her own childhood home or nah?

w.c: 4.1k / warnings include: Ellie is a bit rude in the beginning, some Joel slander, she’s just hella uptight, mutual pining, kissing, she makes out with your hooha, but it’s hot. ;-;

“Am I even doing this right?” you mutter down at the pocket knife you had angled, poorly sharpening it’s blade with the edge of the worn-down whetstone you and Ellie happened to find upon arrival to Joel’s cabins.

She gives you, and both the board, a once-over before turning back to the picture frames lined up on the wall, “Sure.” Rolling your eyes, you throw the knife onto the counter, “You know, I didn’t know he had such a swanky place.”

“Yeah. Reeaal swanky.” She huffs, scrunching her brows in annoyance when the clatter of the knife you’d just thrown doesn’t quiet down immediately, “You find the checkbook yet?”

Ah, the checkbook. You almost forgot she recruited you out here to practically rob her adoptive dad blind.

I mean, fuck, had you had the luck of being in her place— living so lavishly, you’d let the bastard yell at you all he wanted.

Dragging your finger tips across the wooden counter, careful to not splinter them, you push yourself off where you were leaning, and walk towards the stairs, “Doesn’t it make sense for him to like, I don’t know, have it upstairs?”

Ellie runs a hand down her tired face, letting out a huge sigh before turning towards when you stand near the railing, your foot already placed on the first step. Why didn’t she think of that before? She gives you the green light, following behind as you ascend up the stairs. She finds her breath hitched and her eyes closing in further irritation when you suddenly stop, her face parallel with your lower back due to the step-to-height difference.

“Is that you?” You say, a smile stretching on your face as you point towards the meek framed photo that hung above the handrail, depicting a pre-teen Ellie in a science museum tee, Joel slightly crouched behind her with two thumbs up. You almost would have missed the small smile she has in the snapshot had you had nor squinted, “Didn’t know you had a dimple. Do still have it?” You ask, turning down towards where she stood.

“No. Now move.” She huffs, bumping your shoulder as she takes lead, climbing up the rest of the stairs. Rude. Nonetheless, you follow her as you enter into the main hallway. How the hell was a cabin this big? you’re only in it for, like, less than a season— Right? Not like you would know, the fanciest thing you’d ever seen was the time you went to Dina’s Bat Mizvah down at the community center and got to see a chocolate fountain, granted it was years ago, it’s the closest thing you’d ever experienced comparisable to ‘upper echelon.’

She seemingly notices your distant stare, harshly bringing her palms together in a large clap thus pulling you out of your thoughts. Clearly taken aback, you meet her blank gaze, “You take the attic, i’ll take the main bedroom”

“Where—

“Down the hall, to your left. You’ll see the ladder cord hanging.” She cuts you off, already walking away and into one of the many doors you could only assume led to Joel’s bedroom. Okay! This should be easy!

It was not easy.

On your hands and knees, you cough uncontrollably from the dust that blocks insulation. It errupted when you pulled the damn ceiling ladder cord down. All this money and they couldn’t fucking dust it once in a while? Wait, when was the last time this place was even entered? That was the question you asked as you slowly tip-toed up with wide eyes. immediate, you’re met with U-haul boxes, plastic dinosaur figurines and some comics.

In that moment, you smile a bit as you kneel on the floor, grabbing the Stegosaurus and T-rex as you gently knock them against eachother, playing with them.

Though you swear you were being satirical when you began toying with them, you couldn’t help thoughts drift to a younger Ellie playing with these like you were. She’d probably always call dibs on the Carnivore, giving the other person an eyeroll when they cry at how unfair she was being for never giving them a turn at being the razor-bearing predator. ‘Skill issue’ she’s also snicker when the kids run back to their parents.

When you finally put them down after some time, you walk over to one of the several moving boxes. Some tattered, some dirty and some even still closed up. It was wrong for you to have been snooping around her childhood home, sure, but she’s also stealing from her own said home— so you can’t be that bad. Reaching into the closest one near you, you pull out a small velvet belt. One that stroke resemblance to the ones you’d see in the cheesy karate-cop movies your dad had been a fan of. Another, and another and shortly, you have a large array of belts, with at the very bottom of the box containing a small plaque of achievements, ‘Ellie Williams’ printed in fine, gold lettering, ‘Graduate from the Jackson institute of Martial Arts.’

Of course, she was a prodigy at everything. What wasn’t Ellie good at? She’d been your highschool’s valedictorian a couple years back when you both were about to graduate, given the golden chance to speak at the commencing, well, was. That was before passing the chance onto the second runner without a second thought; she claimed she wasn’t the talking type and just casually went about her day, like it wasnt the opportunity most students would have killed for. Students like you, who spent all night and day to even make a dent in the social stratosphere that was highschool.

Given now you both were in your early 20’s, you still hold admiration for Ellie. Maybe that’s why when she randomly called you to hangout after years, you didn’t question it, or even second guess yourself.

How long Ellie had been standing there watching you coo over her baby pictures was something you, and both she couldn’t answer. Originally wanting to smack you on the head or scare you, she couldn’t help but lean against the attic wall, eyeing the way you carefully place her achievements down like they were the most important thing to you.

You’d always been like that since Ellie can recall meeting you. Always so nice, so sensible, always the first one in the room to make light out of nothing. You definitely would have been burnt on the cross or something for just how smiley you were if you were alive back in that day. Ellie found you interesting in ways she couldn’t configure why.

She and Joel had a falling out a couple of weeks ago. He cut her off of all financial support, insisting she get a job or a higher education like her peers were. A few profanities and insults were thrown around, leading eventually to her getting kicked out. Funny. Though she never cared about being embarrassed or the opinions of others, she did feel some sort of seeping humiliation. So, with the money she had, she booked a hotel and called you up. She chuckles when she remembers the first time she sent the address, your hesitancy to type back as you get the wrong, but expected idea,

‘ .’.im not fucking u lol’

‘wth no I got kicked out’

‘OHHH srry!!! D: ‘

The chuckle that hears behind startles, your grip seemingly loosening on the picture frame you had in-hand meeting the floor in cruel shatters. Quiet consumes you both with your hands shaking erratically, “O-oh my god? i’m so sorry, I don’t even know why I did that. fuckfuckfuck!! It was an accident. I can pay for that! Like, i’m so so sorry—l” you frantically plead with her, your eyes alternating from her and the bloody gla—bloody?

“You’re bleeding.” Ellie sighs, softly reaching forward to grab your wrist, pulling you around the mess you caused. You didn’t even realize you were until you felt the blood drip from your ankles down to your shins, staining your bleach-white socks in scarlet droplets.

“I messed up, Ellie, i’m really sorry.”

“Can you like, stop apologizing? It’s fine. Didn’t even know when that picture was taken anyways.”

Somehow, her words worsen your hysteric state, you sinking down back onto your knees as you sob. Oh god, she didn’t even know when that picture was taken meaning it’s that long ago. Ellie stares at you clearly with a panicked look, not really knowing how to comfort you— or anyone for that matter. Again, you were more of the sensible one between them, even if you two hadn’t exactly been all that close growing up in the same town, school and similarly interconnected friend groups. ‘What would you do?’ So, Ellie slightly crouches down, her squeaky sneakers noising as she awkwardly encircles her arms around you. Clearly taken aback by this gesture, you peer up from where your head was buried inbetween your knees and instead, at Ellie, who’s usual laid-back expression is replaced with furrowed brows, her eyes not meeting yours and some reddening on her cheeks. “Y-you’ve seen the picture frames around, man, I see myself all the time. It’s fine.”

You sniffle abit before giving her a coherent answer that isn’t just hiccups, “Im sorry.” She sighs before slightly reaching up to pat your head, “Please stop crying, I think i’m more off-put by your ugly cries than you breaking shit.” That tugs a laugh out of you, pushing Ellie away as she matches your grin. “I mean look, you ruined my tee.” She wasn’t lying, you look down to her white tee and it was absolutely soaked with shed tears belonging to you. You gently run your thumbs over her chest in a bad attempt to wipe your embarassingly smeared mascara off, but it only recieves a small whine from Ellie, who backs away immediately. You’re left confused when she gets up, clearing her voice. “We should continue searching.” With that, she leaves the attic, leaving you up there and with multiple. How could ones demeanor change that often? You almost noticed the sensitivity in her chest.

“Pfft, softie.” You mutter, a smile on your lips as you follow her down. Eventually, Ellie is the one to find the book, it’s placed inbetween some folded jeans. ‘Fuck yeah..’ She bites her chapped lip as she flips through it. Enough pages for her, and a good forged signature she’d mastered when he’d be too lazy to sign her field trip permission slips— guess something did pay off. You stand there with crossed arms, feeling a bit squeamish all of a sudden, like the thought had hit you finally, Ellie is moving away. She notices you when she lifts her gaze up, puzzled with your stance, “I told you it’s okay, the picture frame can be replaced.”

“I don’t want you to move away.”

“What.”

“I won’t repeat myself.” You shake your head defiantly, standing your ground when she towers over you, all these years and when you two have somewhat of a bond, she wants to move away? And maybe yeah, you had it coming, being easily-attached to somehow who’d you’d only started recently hanging out with. “What makes you think I care?” She mocks, looking at you like you’d grown an extra head, she’s almost astonished with your stupidity, why would she have dragged you all the way here to just, stay? Something with the way she says those words churns humility deep in your gut, who were you to even admit that to her? You flail around your arms passively as you back away, a croak in your throat, “Just something I said. You’re a cool person.”

“Right, well, I got the checkbook meaning we can get the hell out. Seeing this place almost makes me want to not drain Joel’s pockets.” She yawns, throwing you the book before retreating into one of the previous rooms, though before, she asks, “Say, where’d we put the keys?”

..

Who had the keys?

Comically enough, sirens began to faintly hear in the back, and your gaze locks onto Ellie’s, “Fuck— find the keys.” She says, running back into the room. How petty was her dad to call the police on them? Well, petty enough to have alarms laying around incase his thieving daughter comes around. You, instantly begin to eye around for them, palms growing clammy at the aspect of being arrested now comes into plan as the sirens grow closer. Finding them, you call out to Ellie who seemingly was already on her way once she heard the jingles of them, “Out the back. You’re gonna run, and not turn back, ‘alright?” She whispers, grabbing you and running towards the kitchen door once the front door is knocked.

Once it’s kicked in, Ellie manages to get out with a groan, definitely a bruiser, but nonetheless, they make it out of the area without getting caught. While she hasn’t broken a sweat yet, you were coughing up a storm like you were earlier, eyes tearing up as you let them out in fits. She gently rubs your back, looking around for where their parked car was, it was a good idea they’d parked so far away- granted it was flawed in multiple ways, it came out in their good favor. Once you’d caught your breath, Ellie hums, “You know where we parked?” You nod, looking around, “Yeah. near the marked tree, you smeared my lipstick over it..” She scrunches her nose to prevent a loud laugh from coming out, your sadness over lipstick being funny to her, “Right. That way.”

You both find the car and enter, ellie starting the car as she backs up and maneuvers around the various tall trees it was parked around before getting onto the main road. You don’t say anything for the majority of the one hour ride, those 60 minutes feeling like the longest ones to Ellie who’s gotten use to your talkitive habits. So when she asks you if you want aux, you shake your head— deflating her mood. She sighs, lighting up a cigarette at the light and rolling down the window. You just lean your head back and rest your eyes, emotions running through that you couldn’t even seem to process. Tiredness, embarrassment of her flat out saying she’d never stay for you, getting almost booked by the police, and just ones you didn’t want to acknowledge at all. You wanted to just, go to sleep.

Ellie, on the otherhand, feels nothing but anxiety gnawing at her. Why does she care so much whether you talk to her or not? She’s never even liked talking, and somehow, the thought of never speaking to you again after this makes her feel nauseous. Would you text her? Call her? Visit her if she left? Would you buy the nearest train ticket if she told you one day to come when she settles into her new place? Or would you just move on? Would you move onto some cooler girl in town to befriend? Some other girl you’d look up to, some other girl who would show you the hidden gems around town you’d been asking her to, Fuck— some other girl you’d give all your affection to. Ellie swerves the car, and had it not been your quick-wit to pull the steering back, she might have crashed the vehicle.

Pulling over, she places her head lightly on the leather wheel while you stare at her in bewilderment, “Are you crazy?! What was that?!” You say with a slight twitch in your eye at her loss of control.

“I don’t want to move away.”

“You literally have to, we’re on the side of the road and your emergency lights aren’t on so.”

“I’ll stay.”

“You can’t, that’s like, against the rules. I don’t know, my permit is expired.” First order of business, obtain a license.

“In Jackson. I’ll stay in Jackson.” She mumbles, lifting her head up to stare at you. This feels like a joke to you, like Ellie might just begin laughing at you when you show the tiniest bit of you of relief. So, you just match her stare, tiling your head. “Why?” Why? What do you mean why? Ellie wants to scream, why don’t you look happy? She’s staying for you.

“Just..wanted to.” She says after a beat or two, pulling the car back onto the road as she nears your house. Giving a curt nod, you look out the window, your knees feeling wobbly like a teenage girl all over again as you suppress asking questions to the clearly disoriented freckled girl. Once on arrival, Ellie expects you to leave and slam that door but instead, you sit there for a bit.

“My mom isn’t here.” You say, chewing your inner-cheek.

“You don’t have a spare key or ‘sum?”

“No no I do, it’s just— want to come in?” You ask her with big eyes, your hands folded on your lap like a child on their best behavior to get something.

“Did your mom bake that pie you got me last time?” She’s referring to the Cherry Pie your mom made last time you two hung out.

“Is the sky blue?” You say, with a smile, trying to lighten the mood that’ll need more than just that to recover.

“It’s grey but I see your point. I’ll go park, leave the front door open.” She smiles when you nod, skipping out of the car and into your home.

When she does so, and enters your door, she’s met with a warm wafting smell of baked goods. Ellie might gave been fairly thin, but she had a nose on her, leading her to the kitchen. You’ve changed out of your dirty clothes, she notices, you now wearing some small pajama shorts and a tanktop. You’re bent over the oven, grabbing the treats out of the pre-heated oven your mother had likely left them in to retain warmth.

“You’ve got to stop doing that.” You mutter, almost dropping the tray of food while Ellie smirks

“Can’t really promise accepting an apology if you dropped those.” She says, walking on over to where you stood by the kitchen island. Something in the way she says that so..flirtatiously, makes you look back at her twice. “Whatever. Do me a favor, take the plates out while I cut the pieces.” Ellie nods, walking over to the several arrays of cabinets. Though, upon doing so, she notices your refrigerator, decorated in colorful magnets, children’s literature and most of all, a picture of you, and an older woman. You were younger, hair a bit longer than you had it now, and a wide grin with your front tooth missing. You couldn’t of been older than 6, Ellie thinks. Smiley.

“This your mom?” she asks, running her fingerpads alongst the smooth film while you hum, nodding. “Yeah, it’s my mom” You say, handing her a slice of piece when she gives you the plate, “You look alike.” Ellie concludes when you two begin walking upstairs to your room.

It was certainly your room, is what the auburnette thinks as she sits on your bed. Messy bedsheets you never got to make, clothes scattered near your closet and other things you never got to clean up when she’d called you up this morning at such an ungodly time to divulge you in on her scheme,

though now, upon her decision to stay in the town, it seemed a bit for nothing. It’d be a funny story to tell with you. With you, she thinks, watching as you chew the treat and sit on the rugged floor as you flip through TV channels. Eventually settling on some show Ellie never knew was still even airing. She quietly sinks from the bed, onto the floor herself, sitting close to you as your gaze stays glued to the blaring screen, flashes of color reflecting onto your face as each scene passes. Ellie finds herseld staring at you, a person she once found so inconspicuous now becoming the very reasoning she stays in a town she hates so much. Whatever you had the girl under needed to be looked at.

“Do you like me?” Is what she wants to ask, but “Do you have a boyfriend?” is what she settles for.

You turn to her, meekly shaking your head. Since when was she sat so close to you?

Ellie nods, looking back at the show to get you to, before asking another question, “Girlfriend?” You shrug, “I mean, I use to talk to this one girl..”You mutter, before Ellie finds herself furthering it, “What happened?”

You sigh, before pointing a finger, “Don’t laugh.” you glare. Ellie smiles, nodding. “She told me she was straight after like 2 days AND THEN, i saw her kissing on Judy.” Ellie snorts, “No fucking way, Judy the librarian?” You nod, burying your face in a nearby throw pillow.

“I need a drink.” You mutter, getting up and leaving the room with Ellie in it. You return shortly after with a bottle of wine and some glasses. The girl groans as she stretches, “Now you’re talking. Pour me some.”

Eventually, the topic heads in the way of relationships once more, with you two telling each other of your awful sex lives in the majority straight town Jackson was as you sip.

As Ellie tells one, you find your eyes feeling heavy, alternating between her green eyes down to her pale pink lips. You nod, poorly attempting to give the illusion you were following along with whatever she was saying. Ellie, herself, wasn’t all that there but she was better. She’d stopped talking long ago and was just moving her lips with no dialogue coming out whatsoever, seeing if you’d ask why she halted her story. She licks her lips, leaning back as she places her glass down on the nightstand near her— jean-clad thighs spread tantalizingly as your gaze drops to them.

Her years of martial arts and track did her well, you admit, hoping it wasn’t obvious you were ogling the girl.

“Were you mad at me earlier?” you whisper, fidgeting with the loose seam of her jeans as you notice the difference in how she was acting at the cabin, and how she is now. Ellie hums, matching your small voice. “I was more so mad at myself.” She answers you, her hand finding where yours toys with a string, “Not at you.”

You nod, not really having anything to say.

“Can I kiss you?” you finally utter, liquid courage taking over as Ellie thumbs your soft hips from where you sit so closely. She gives you a soft ‘yeah’, pulling you onto her lap. You begin by littering feathery pecks along her jaw, her sensitivity earlier when you touched her chest beginning to make sense when goosebumps begin to arise along her pale skin, her nipples hardening as the hair on her neck stands before kissing her deeply.

You two kiss slowly for a while, finding some rhythm as it slowly turns into something else. You gently gasp when Ellie rocks your hips onto her thigh, making you detach from her mouth and straddle it the way she wants you to. The rough texture against her jeans on your soft shorts makes you huff a bit, face burning up as you grip her shoulders.

“You’re my sweet girl, you can do it.” She murmurs lowly, watching you grind all over her, your slick slowly starting to seep onto her denim pants— all like she wanted. You nod, frustrated to the brim of tears when you can’t seem to fuck yourself on her thigh well. Ellie pushes you down, caging your legs in between her hips as she tilts her head back down, "Seems like you're not the only sweet girl wanting my attention.." She smiles as you moan, the heel of her palm placed directly on your touch-starved mound, giving it just enough pressure and angling to make you whine out a small 'Ellie..'

She gives you finally what you want, sliding your shorts to the side and sighs when she sees just what a mess has been waiting for her.

No underwear?

You attempt to leverage yourself by sitting up on your elbows but Ellie pushes you down, hiking your hips up even more with a singular grasp of your shins as she kisses directly on your puffy pussy, your messy sap smearing all over her lips before giving you a grin,

Oh, you'd pay her what she was worth alright. Maybe returning Joel's checkbook can wait after this.

[All credits to the owner of the picture above!! i got it from popipa on pinterest]

[heretherebeturtles-comic]

How long does the process take you to get one (or more) comic page done? I love the idea of making comics but i suck at structure, you know with the script and posting/layout. I was wondering if you had any tips or what you wish you knew before you started.?

Sorry if this had been asked before

OOOooooo a fun question for me!! I love talking about comic creation :D

I do my best to keep the full process under 2 days (or 12-14 hours of work) per fully coloured page. I'm trying to get faster, but speed comes with time and experience.

Hmmm as for tips and things I wish I knew... so many things... I should let it be known that I am an artist and not really a writer, but your questions are focused on script/planning/structure, so I'm going to focus the advice on that.

Start with something small - Learn about making comics and find a comfortable style through making a couple smaller comics and then try your passion project. Writing and planning smaller comics with fewer pages takes a different kind of puzzle solving and thought process. Smaller page limits can force you to try new things which you can then apply to larger projects to save time; limitations breed creativity after all. Every attempt made (even an unfinished project) is knowledge gained that you can apply again for future projects.

Study comics! - It's hard to create if you aren't feeding the mind and giving it things to learn and create from. Read comics made by professionals and study how they handle pacing. How many pages are they dedicating to each moment? What do you think of their pacing and what would you change? Take a sketchbook and make small rectangles and draw out the panel layout from that comic. What are they doing that works and what don't you like about it? How would you do that differently? ... I think this is me assigning homework... i am so sorry.

Set a hard page limit - Try to get your story told within that limit, and then add more pages if necessary. More pages = more time you have to spend working on it. Most standard single issue American comics are roughly 24 pages. I try to work inside that limit using a rough 5 page per scene structure.

Condense or Cut - I struggle so hard with this one, but comics aren't written in the same way as a novel is. They have a slightly different plot structure and a much more limited amount of pages to tell the story in. Obviously it depends on the story being told, and what kind of scenes are important to that genre of story, but in general, unnecessary scenes should be cut out. examples...

CUT! Having the characters go out to get ice cream is cute, but you don't need to show them each ordering their ice cream unless the flavour they choose is an important plot point. Skip to the last one receiving their ice cream and turning to the others who already have theirs and are having that deep discussion. OR skip that scene entirely and have a quiet panel of them sitting in the park at sunset, already holding their ice cream, before delving into the deep emotional conversation they will be having.

CONDENSE! You can combine two scenes if you need to. If you have one scene where two characters are having a casual conversation and another where they are sneaking into a building? Stick them together. They can sneak AND talk and now you've only used up 5 pages instead of 10.

Comics take a LONG TIME to make!! - you have to make peace with that _(:Ⅰ」∠)_ Comics, especially full colour ones, are an extremely labour intensive and time consuming way of telling a story. If one page takes 1 day (8 hrs of work) and you have 24 pages, that is 24 days of working on one comic.

Thumbnails! - Draw the pages small and rough first! It's easier to plan things and mess around with the layouts when you don't have an emotional attachment to how the art inside looks. Once you have a layout you like, you can then draw it again in full page size and work on it from there.

Page and panel layouts are my favourite part of the whole process, I could talk forever about it, but I do not have the energy for it right now. I'll save panel/page layout for another time.

It doesn't have to be perfect!!! - IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE PERFECT!!!! (shouted with excitement btw). Panels can be boring! A page can be extremely simple! The art can be messy! The dialog can be simple! The plot can go nowhere! In fact it is really really fun to make a messy imperfect comic on purpose. Destroy the perfectionist in you, because they will always and forever hold you back from actually creating things. "what if it's bad?" what if it's fun? what if you learn cool things?

Anyway, those are my tips/advice, idk if I actually answered what you were asking... sorry about all the time commitment ones, that is something I really wish I had figured out a few years ago lol.

Comics are fun to make and a lot of learning how to make them is just jumping in, encountering a problem, and then learning how to solve it.

[aziraphales-library]

Hii mods

I was wondering if you had any fics where azi and Crowley are on tv shows?

Like I’ve seen ones about them on strictly, would I lie to you, antiques roadshow, bake off, the office, but it’s super hard to find fics like that because I’m not aware of there being a specific tag for stuff like that ? (Apart from human Au ig).

Thank you for everything you do on here btw lol :))

Hello! We have an #actors au tag you might be interested in (which includes Slow Show, so there's no need to add it in the notes!). Here are some TV show fics outside of the ones you've already listed...

First dates by Amyk89 (M)

Do you know that reality TV show called First dates? This is a human au, where Aziraphale goes on that and meets bartender Crowley there. If you haven’t seen the show, it’s just about 2 people going on a blind date, then at the end of their first date, the host asks if they want to go on a second date. It’s super awkward. But just imagine how awkward it’ll be when you’ve been flirting with the bartender the whole night?

666 Heartbeats by AppleSeeds (T)

Aziraphale is a contestant on his favourite game show, 666 Heartbeats, where the amount of time he will have to answer the questions is dictated by how fast his heart is beating. If he wants to win big, he'll just have to stay calm. Easier said than done when he has an enormous crush on the host, who won't stop reassuringly touching him.

A Narrow Escape to the Country by shaggydogstail (T)

Crowley and Aziraphale appear as house hunters on BBC daytime institution, Escape to the Country. They are incredibly annoying. Sympathies, please, for the unlucky producer who is not getting paid enough to put up with their nonsense.

How to Win a Lifetime Achievement Award for Services to Television (and how not to) by GaryOldman (T)

Crowley hosts a late night comedy talk show. Aziraphale hosts a feel good morning talk show. When Crowley is asked to present Aziraphale with a lifetime achievement award, everything goes a bit skew-whiff. ----- Normally when I don’t get something that everyone else seems to be mad on my first point of call is the wonderful world of the internet, but we’ve had a falling out you see, the internet and I. Despite my many years as late night show host meets investigative journalist meets comic genius meets veritable sex god (though Wikipedia only acknowledges the first of these accomplishments, despite my many attempts at editing the listing) they have turned on me. I’m a gif. And a meme.

Dating in the Dark by miraworos (E)

Anthony J. Crowley, owner of a failing joke-shop, and Aziraphale, bookshop proprietor with an overbearing family, meet as contestants on a blind dating show. They form an instant connection as roommates but soon find themselves at odds as they compete to win the top spot, and the favor of the same lady.

Married at First Sight by Aracloptia (T)

“Well, that was a thing,” Crowley said once they were out of earshot. Without talking about it, they were both heading down the field, towards the lake where the photographer (and likely a few more people from the TV crew) was waiting. “That was a wedding,” Aziraphale replied, surprised at his own annoyance that somebody called a wedding a ‘thing’. “Yeah, obviously, didn’t miss that part,” Crowley said with a shrug, and waved abruptly in Aziraphale’s general direction. “Neither did you, from the looks of it, since you’re dressed like a wedding bride and everything.” “Excuse me, I am a—“ Aziraphale stopped himself, and started over. In which Aziraphale ends up marrying a rude stranger who wears sunglasses.

- Mod D

[yuurei20]

(This was originally an ask received through Twitter)

"Hello! Can you please elaborate on the time loop theory in book 2 that you mentioned in the tweet where you talked about your favourite theories?"

I am wary about discussing this theory as there are many others who have put much more thought into it than I have, but I can certainly try with what I was able to find :>

(The information in this thread was combined from here, here, here, and here)

The basic theory is that everything we know is repeating in a loop in an attempt to either stop something from happening or to make something happen.

The game’s tagline of “I will show you a true happy ending” (EN: “Let us show you the real happily-ever-after”) could be insinuating that there have already been less than happy endings, and we may have already seen one: while some theorize that the events of the prologue are showing us what is going to happen in the future, others say that it is both that and something that has already happened.

The theory goes that the battle with the chimera (who may or may not be an overblotted Grim) was lost and everyone (or just the prefect) is sent back to try again, thus the opening lines of the game narrated in Crowley’s voice.

(Note: I would have translated this as “I—they—you—only have a little time left. Whatever you do, don’t let go”, but the situation is so vague that anything is possible.)

(Here is a short comic insinuating that this time loop is Crowley’s unique magic (warning: blood, death, a Yuu design))

This theory seems to be largely inspired by Mickey’s comment that he has seen the same dream three times but he also says “your voice gets clearer and clearer every time.”

Since Mickey also shows up in Books 2 and 3 but we were not able to speak with him, it is possible that this is not actually hinting at two earlier loops, just earlier events within the same timeline. This does not dismiss the time loop theory and might mean that this is Mickey’s first time interacting with the loop, but there have been far more than just two or three timelines.

(This account pretends that Book 7 does not exist yet, so that is about as specific as I can get.)

The theory gets kind of wild with references to STYX’s simulation system, supposed inconsistencies with Ace and Epel, Crowley’s potential connection to STYX, etc, but one thing that everyone seems to agree on is: Leona knows.

Leona is extremely powerful and extremely private.

He has had a number of contracts with Azul who is also a powerful mage, and according to Idia he seems like “the kind of guy who always knows he’s dreaming.”

Yana has confirmed that Idia has a part in Book 7 and, with both him and Leona halfway out of their coffins in promotional art, people are wondering if Leona will be stepping up as well.

We know that Riddle’s current personality is a 180 degree change from original plans and that this change was made pretty far into development, after everything had already been approved.

There are also rumors that Leona’s Book 2 was the original Book 6, looking at older promotional information (Book 2 was originally listed between Ignihyde and Diasomnia on the official website).

It is possible that—much like Riddle’s situation—Yana came up with a better idea than what had originally been decided, and it required shoehorning Leona’s drama into an earlier Book in order to make it work.

This would mean that Book 7 used to have significant space for Leona (there is a pattern of the previous Overblotter having a role in the next Book).

That space may have been rewritten for Idia, but it is also possible that Idia’s role was added separately and a role for Leona remains to some extent, which is why they went out of their way to say that Leona knows when he is in a dream.

Theories vary from “Leona is 100% aware of what is going on, broke free from the loop and he is the only one getting older as he tries to save the world” to “Leona knows something isn’t right but not exactly what.”

The proof that people usually point to is his comment where he is unsurprised by Grim “always” eating black stones (which he shouldn’t know anything about), but the phrasing is so vague that he could just be making the connection between the stones and a potential blot-risk.

Another scene that is often referenced in the “Leona knows” conversation is an interaction with Jamil where he accurately predicts Jamil’s attack on Kalim despite how rarely they interact before Book 6.

There are also the three white chess pieces on the chessboard in Leona’s bedroom that seem to correspond to the only three characters in the game with light cosmic magic: a white rook for Rook, a white knight for Silver and a white pawn for Kalim, whom Leona literally refers to as a pawn piece in chess during Tamashima-Mina (these three chess pieces are also displayed prominently in Leona's first Birthday groovy).

Leona also seems suspicious of Crowley, suspects what really happened in Book 5 and is able to literally sniff out magic, which we have seen no other character capable of doing.

Leona is very perceptive in general: he is suspicious of Lilia in Spectral Soiree, calls him an old man when no other character outside of Diasomnia knows his true age, is the first to figure out that Malleus is pretending to be possessed and is able to tell when someone becomes injured and is trying to hide it in both Book 6 and an event.

This is not proof that Leona knows what is happening, but it may be an argument for why it is likely that he knows more than he is willing to let on.

Some versions of the time loop theory say that the same prefect is being sent back over and over again to try and save everyone (which ties into the game’s opening), while other versions say that this is the prefect’s first time being summoned into a loop that has been going on for a long time without them, in an effort by someone (Crowley?) to change the ending of the story.

While not technically part of the game, the Twst novelization supports the first pattern while the manga series supports the second, with new prefects showing up after the previous prefect presumably fails.

Knowing Yana it is possible that the game is actually a third, entirely different pattern with the novel and manga exploring alternatives that were considered for the game but not used.

[lazycats-stuff]

Hi! Can you pls do a batfam x male child reader who loves weapons where Jason takes the reader on his first little mission without Bruce knowing?

Oh that's adorable. It's short, but sweet because where I am it's so hot right now, you feel like dying and just laying around trying to cool off... Anyways, if any of you live in a place where it's very hot, take care of yourselves. Drink water and put on your sunscreen people. Heat is not a joke...

Okay, Jason knew that this wasn't the greatest idea ever and he did calculate how Bruce would react if he was ever to find out about this. And while he did know that Bruce would kill him for doing this, Jason knew that sooner or later (Y/N) would want to go on missions, just like them.

Dick was already going on patrol at the time so it wasn't going to be that bad. If necessary, he was going to use that as an excuse if he is ever caught with (Y/N).

He smiled at the sight of (Y/N) in the old Robin suit, he was so adorable. He put his helmet on and off they went into the night. This night was one of the many firsts for (Y/N). It was way past his bedtime, he never really got a chance to drive on a motorcycle and he never went to these parts of Gotham...

Jason hoped that Bruce never found out about this. He already made (Y/N) promise to not tell Bruce anything. (Y/N) agreed, seeing that Jason was doing a lot for him, something that would probably not make his dad happy.

(Y/N) was enjoying the night, strapped in, Jason making sure that (Y/N) is safe, knowing the dangers of driving a motorcycle. It looked quite comical, a big guy driving and what could be a baby on the front.

" Okay, baby bird, we are here. Do you remember the plan? " Jason asked, parking the bike.

" Yes! You distract them from the front and I sneak in to plant explosives on the spots you said. " (Y/N) said, excited as Jason made sure that (Y/N) is ready.

Jason was already here and he marked all the spots where (Y/N) was supposed to go. " And after that? " Jason asked, making sure that (Y/N) knew the plan.

" Then I go here. " (Y/N) said all excited. Jason nodded and he stood up.

" Come on little bird, on you get. "

Everything went smoothly. (Y/N) did exactly what Jason wanted him to do. He did everything to a T and Jason couldn't be more prouder. He took (Y/N) into his arms, grunting a bit, due to the fact that he got heavier. They grow up so fricking fast.

" Good job little bird, you did a good job. " Jason praised his little brother, who giggled.

" Are we going to do this again? " (Y/N) inquired, smiling.

" We are, little bird, we are. " Jason said, leaning his head against (Y/N)'s. His baby brother is growing up to fast. He still remembers when (Y/N) was a little baby. Such a little baby too... Not the time to be emotional.

" Okay, little bird, lets go back home. I can't have B finding out about our little mission now can we? " Jason said, putting (Y/N) on the motorbike, giving him a small helmet.

" Come on, baby bird let's go back. You need your sleep. "

Jason snuck into the house, carrying his little brother in his arms upstairs, making sure that he isn't seen by any of his siblings. He changed (Y/N) into his PJs and made sure he brushed his teeth.

Afterwards he tucked him into bed. He removed some of (Y/N)'s hair out of his eyes. " Did you enjoy our mission tonight? " Jason asked once more.

" I did Jay. I want to do it again. " (Y/N) said, eyes closing.

" And we will. Now go to sleep. "

(Y/N)'s eyes closed and he out like a light. Jason gave him a kiss on the forehead and left the room, making sure to leave it ajar.

He quickly went to his room, avoiding his other siblings like a plague.

[noturlondonboy]

An open letter to Kevin Fiege

Note: please do not take this too seriously chat, I was assigned with writing an open letter for my English class, and I decided I needed to diss on Kevin to my English professor for a little while.

————

Dear Kevin Fiegi, (I know I spelled your name wrong, it is intentional.)

I’d just like to start off with a very sincere screw you. And if this wasn’t a school assignment that my professor is going to read, I would be using some choosier words.

Second, kindly go to Hell. Emily, my apologies. Moving on.

Let’s start with one of the most glaringly obvious problems you created and let happen in the MCU- the confusing and unnecessary death of Natalia Alianova Romanova, otherwise known as Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow.

I can understand Natasha insisting that she be the one to sacrifice herself instead of Clint- it fits her character archetype and offers a solid way for her character to die with dignity. If it weren’t such a stupid idea to kill her off in the first place.

Might I offer an alternative to keeping one of the arguably most important characters in the Marvel Universe dead in the cinematic adaptations? Did we even think about Tony Stark bringing her back with the Infinity Gauntlet when he revived half the world’s population? Did we consider at all that maybe when Steve Rogers made the (horrible) decision to stay behind in the 40’s, he could have warned the team about the dangers in Endgame? Maybe he could have prevented the Snap in the first place.

Maybe, maybe, maybe… so many options, and yet, here we are, onto Phase 5 of the MCU and Natasha Romanoff-less.

More on Steve in a second.

Natasha’s death felt unnecessary, shallow, and forced in order to create a narrative with enough drama and angst to soothe the most particular crowds. While we already had very few strong, main female characters, the loss of the Black Widow only adds the problematic misogyny in the MCU. This is aided by the fact that we received only one Black Widow movie (after she had canonically died, mind you) and have three Iron Man movies, four Thor movies, and three Captain America movies with a fourth on the way.

I’m sensing a pattern here, Kevin. A pattern I do not like.

If we wanted to stay on the topic related to misogyny, we could talk about Wanda Maximoff, and the injustice served to her character in Dr. Strange and the Multiverse of Madness. The show Wandavision gave us a beautiful narrative of how Wanda reacted to her immeasurable grief, and wove together an exciting story that provided us with intriguing lore and storyline options. However, in the absolute dookie bomb of Multiverse of Madness, almost every single point of conflict and character development that Wanda experienced was completely trashed and ignored in favor of turning her into a villain for the sake of villainy.

A terrible reason, by the way. Literally what the hell. Kevin. I am so incredibly upset with you.

Back to Steve Rogers, as promised.

Steve in himself is an incredibly in-depth character that absolutely lives up to the hype. He’s Captain-freaking-America. His actions are purposeful, his morals and strong and set in doing what is right, not what is expected. *cough cough* When Steve decided to stay in the 40’s when returning the Infinity Stones, he disrupted several important plot points. In Agent Carter, Peggy Carter moves on from Steve when he’s lost to the ice and finds love and peace and happiness with someone else. Steve ultimately steals back her affection from that life she had built for herself, and the importance she completed in her life with that man.

Have you ever watched Agent Carter, Kevin? Have you read any of the comics that you’re adapting for the screen? Have you seen the movies? The shows? Do you understand the plot lines you’re supposedly in charge of?

Secondly, we cannot forget about Bucky Barnes, even though Steve most certainly did. Remember Bucky, Kevin? Remember Steve’s best and closest friend? The man he promised to always stick with, “to the end of the line”?

No, Kevin. Clearly, you do not remember. Steve absconding Bucky was entirely out of character and makes no sense. What are we even doing here?

Thank you, but no thank you, Kevin. Please hand the MCU reigns over to someone who actually cares about the characters and what the fans want (in a reasonable sense.)

-London, aka the one you should hand them to.

[pluckyredhead]

so what did you not like about worlds finest teen titans? There were a lot of dropped plot threads and bits I expected Waid to develop more (Roy and Ollie conflict, Roy, Garth and Wally never resolved their sleepover argument, Karen's reaction at the con to nearly being unmasked, Wally's parents, ect) and also the queerbaiting with garth (and his eyes changing colour halfway through???) was annoying. I thought it was cute overall but maybe I'm not familiar enough with some of the characters?

I held on to this ask because I was going to reread the miniseries to answer you more accurately, and then I decided to not put myself through that, so...hopefully my memory is accurate lol.

(I should note before I get into it that none of my quibbles are with Emanuela Lupacchino's art. She's a treasure and we're thrilled that she's here.)

But yeah, you've put the nail on the head with a lot of it. It was just terribly paced, like Waid didn't know how many issues he had or something. Aside from all the dropped threads you mentioned, it felt like the main bad guys were...pretty much hastily introduced, or at least assembled, in #5? There didn't seem to be any kind of...well, point to this miniseries. There was no theme. There was nothing Waid was trying to say, as far as I could tell, except "Fuck Roy Harper." (Oh, we'll get to that.) It wasn't an origin story for the team. It wasn't about adolescence or coming of age or learning who you are, except maybe a little bit for Garth. It was just...there.

And I want to be clear here: Mark Waid is one of my favorite comic book writers of all time. When he hits, he hits. The regular World's Finest book and his Shazam are wonderful. I just think this wasn't the right match of writer/characters, because he didn't handle these very well. Taking them one by one:

Dick: DC is fully in their "Dick the unbearable Mary Sue" era and this book is no exception. If I never see another comic where a whole team of experienced superheroes with major league powers and training stands around like incompetent jackasses until a Bat comes along and tells them what to do, it'll be too soon. I'm here to read about an ensemble book where everyone is a three-dimensional character, not The World's Most Perfect Boy and his loser sidekicks. Not only is it unfair to everyone else in the cast, it's doing a disservice to Dick, who is a much more interesting character than this book (or Tom Taylor, ahem) gives him credit for.

(There's also something very weird and inconsistent Waid is doing across his books with Dick - WF, WFTT, and BvR - where sometimes he's throwing a tantrum because he doesn't get to be a circus star with everyone looking at him all the time, and sometimes he's screaming at Roy for filming them, and both feel utterly arbitrary to me as well as contradictory.)

Donna: Donna's characterization in this was just...bizarre. I was a little worried about how Waid would handle her, since he has a tendency to turn more quote unquote "wholesome" female characters into the Mom Friend (see: his Champions run, where he tries to get away with it by having Kamala announce that she's not going to be the Mom Friend because she's the only girl on the team...and then immediately becoming the Mom Friend), and Donna's already very much a Mom Friend, and I didn't know what Mom Friend Squared would look like. But instead he went for this...Manic Pixie Nightmare Girl approach? Where she's really into bungee jumping and monster trucks? I'm not offended by it, it's just so utterly random. This isn't who Donna is? It's never been who she is? Baffling.

I am offended (I mean, mildly, but still) by the fact that she and Garth are shoehorned together in this. He's the only boy on the team she's never been romantically linked to, even in dreams/hallucinations/whatever, so completing the set feels very much like Donna's only narrative worth is in being a love interest, which...gross.

Garth: Garth probably got the best treatment of the bunch, to be honest. He was in character as the shy little weirdo he was in the Silver Age and in pretty much every flashback we've ever seen. He's smart and perceptive and bad at saying what he wants and generous towards those who have hurt him, all of which is very Garth. I have no complaints about him except the weird queerbaiting, and I'm not blaming Waid for that because from what I understand, solicits are written by editorial working off of a pitch, potentially before the comic is even written, so who knows what happened there? It might have been a stupid joke that didn't land, it might have been a story that was pitched and then a higher up vetoed it, it might have been a story Waid was going to write and then changed his mind. I'm not going to say it's his fault when I have no idea if that's true. Otherwise, I think he handled Garth well.

Wally: Wally was another one where I was just like ??? the whole time. He didn't feel like Wally, he felt like Bart. But, like, fanon's innocent child version of Bart and not the actual canon character, who has a lot more backbone. Why is he hero worshipping Dick like that? Why is he so docile? What was up with that weird line where Dick's like "you're the youngest?" Yes, historically Dick had already dropped out of college while Wally was still in high school, but otherwise they've always been portrayed as the same age. And if it's a reference to debut year, Donna's the youngest. It's such a random throwaway line dumped in at the very end for...why? Confusing me personally?

The worst, though, was whatever the hell was going on with Wally's parents. Wally's parents are not an idyllic suburban couple! They are not the Kents! Rudy West is only not classified as a supervillain because he doesn't have a costume! Even if he hadn't tried to kill Mary, sold the Earth out to alien robots, faked his own death, or run a deadly labor camp for children at this point in the timeline, he definitely hit Wally and, uh, poisoned Wally's Little League coach. I don't think Mary is as bad as some of fandom does, but she's certainly a difficult person. Wally was desperately unhappy at home as a child, which is why he latched on so hard to Barry and Iris. And Waid knows this, because he wrote a lot of that canon. If it's a retcon, it's such a strange, pointless one that makes all of them a lot less interesting. Just baffling.

Karen: I think it was a very smart choice to add Karen to the founding roster and make the team slightly more gender-balanced and not all-white. It's kind of a wasted choice, though, when she's so aggressively sidelined. All she does in this book is hang around with Mal and the support staff. She isn't looped into any of the major emotional conflicts - Garth and Donna, Dick and Roy, Roy and Wally and Garth. She's not treated as a headliner in the same way the others are, and that really sucks.

Roy: Hoo boy.

When Waid was announced as the writer of Batman vs. Robin, I was worried, because I had a feeling he didn't like Damian. I couldn't put my finger on why, it was just a feeling I had. And boy howdy, was I proved right! Damian is treated like shit in that book.

I had the same feeling with this book and Roy, and...let's just say I'm two for two, okay?

Here's the thing. I'm okay with Roy being written as kind of shitty, especially during his period of his life. Teen Titans: Year One writes him as an utter fuckboy, and I love that comic. The Mal and Karen issue of The Other History of the DC Universe retells the Bronze Age Titans era from their perspective, and it pulls absolutely no punches regarding Roy being, well, kind of an asshole...and it's right to do so, because it's drawing very directly from those 1970s comics, and he was often awful in those.

But Waid writes him as a generic 80s movie villain. He's a human popped collar. He's a stereotype of a bully. My problem isn't that I need him to never do anything wrong, it's that nothing in this book is specific to Roy, his history, or his established personality.

For instance, all of his bragging about how much money he has? He comes off like a kid who was born into wealth and has never known anything else, but that isn't true. He was at best middle class before Ollie, probably more likely working class given the economic situation on most reservations - but there's no indication that he's responding specifically to that shift in circumstances. He's just, like, Draco Malfoy with arrows. Also, Dick has a nearly identical history but none of the same issues. He even says "Roy and I have the same background but he sucks." Why is one of them a perfect angel untouched by filthy lucre, and the other is Bradley Uppercrust III?

And then there's the subplot with Ollie neglecting Roy, which fizzled out to a real wet fart of a resolution. But honestly, at no point did I know where Waid was going with that, because...well, if you know Roy's history, you know Ollie neglecting him is what leads directly to Roy getting into drugs. And like...first of all, the timeline here is off, because historically Ollie didn't ditch Roy until after he lost his money, and he still has it here. (How interesting would it have been to have Roy pretending he was still rich in addition to pretending Ollie was around?) But also, this comic ends on an "and now everything is fine!" note, but it isn't! It really, really isn't. So Ollie showing up at the end and being like "I'm here for you, buddy" doesn't ring true, because he is demonstrably not in this very comic, and we also know he won't be in the future. And Roy getting what he wants doesn't feel like a satisfying resolution either because we don't actually get to see changed behavior from him, and again, we know this won't last. (Again, TT:YO handles this dynamic very well, where we see that Ollie is an affectionate but negligent guardian who Roy is learning some very bad habits from.)

And to top it off, constantly contrasting Terrible Roy to Virtuous Dick and simultaneously pretending that Ollie was at this point a responsible guardian has the (I hope unintentional) effect of implying that Roy will eventually become an addict because he's just a bad and weak person, instead of a struggling teen who needed support and didn't get it. I would have actually preferred a story that hinted at the beginning of Roy's addiction and how he hides it from the Titans, because we've never had that story told in comics, but I don't think Waid's the one to write it. Instead we get a conflict that's out of character for Roy, a resolution that doesn't feel at all earned, and the looming threat of Roy's immediate future which Waid refuses to address.

In conclusion, this book was a mess, and you should all read Teen Titans: Year One instead.

[redpenship]

Happy New Year! I’d love to know if you have any headcanons about Mobian culture and/or holidays, either based on things you’ve seen in the games/comics/movies etc OR just stuff you’ve made up for fun. :) Maybe this isn’t really your forte but I thought I’d ask haha!

Happy new year!

I actually don't have too many headcanons on Mobian culture itself. However, I do have HCs for their society in general which I guess would feed into the culture idea anyways. I'm just going to put all of it here because why not.

(Heads up: this post is 1.8k words long).

Thesis I: There is no Mobian state.

If you've read my fic Buzzsaw Dilemma, then you'll have already been given a basic run down on how I think this works. Since I like rambling about this kind of stuff, I will explain everything again, but this time with evidence from canon to support my theory!

To begin, it's always best to define what a "state" actually is. I prefer the Max Weber view as a state being an "organization with a monopoly on the legitimate use of force". Let's break down what this actually means with an example:

The state establishes a rule that you can't assault other people. One day, you feel that someone has wronged you and decide to punch them in the face. A police officer nearby notices this and responds by punching you in the face and detaining you. After spending the night in jail, you're charged with felony assault and the police officer is not. Why?

As a random citizen, you do not have a right to the legitimate use of force. You cannot punch people to get what you want with impunity. The police, as official arms of the state to use against domestic populations, do have a monopoly on the use of force. They can shoot people, put them in prison, and basically do whatever they want (within reason, technically, but the state doesn't like challenges to its authority and will always resist holding itself and its officers accountable for perceived illegitimate uses of force) because they're the only ones allowed to do so! Your boss at work can't kidnap you and hold you prisoner for a year because you broke a rule. The state can do that to you because it is seen as a legitimate use of force.

Now that we both know what a state is, I can explain why I don't think one exists on the Mobian islands. I am going to cite a lot of stuff from IDW since it's allegedly canon now and the games tend not to focus too much on day-to-day life on the islands anyways.

Point one: the Restoration. Since aid organizations apparently don't like working on the islands, which I suspect might be due to the Eggman Empire's fixed presence there, the Restoration was forced to step up after the war to fix up the islands. Although it's true that some states just don't give a shit about their populations, I don't think it's wrong to say that post-war clean up would typically be a job for an existing state. The lack of any central authority points to the conclusion that one may just not exist.

Here are some panels from IDW issue #42:

Here, Zavok is surprised about the lack of security at Restoration HQ. Master Zik explains that Mobians don't see a need to prepare for violence because they aren't violent to each other. This is an interesting assertion given Tails' backstory, but I guess his two tails were just that disturbing to the people at home!

The main takeaway here is that the islands don't really have security guards or police officers. I like these panels for that reason only. I'm afraid the reasoning provided by Zik still implies that police/guards would be necessary if there was violence among Mobians, so it's not really that revolutionary of a worldbuilding moment and realigns the comic with statist ideology.

So, let's summarize: the islands don't have a central authority. They don't have any means to enforce a monopoly on the use of force. Does this mean that they don't have a state? In the absence of government, does the Restoration pave the roads?

In my general opinion, yes. There are some instances that could be used to disprove this theory, such as the Everhold Prison seen in Bad Guys, which is seemingly guarded exclusively by dog Mobians:

The existence of a prison implies a functional penal system, which in turn implies that somebody on the islands has a legitimate monopoly on force. On the other hand, it's never explicitly stated that Everhold Prison is hosted on the islands, so for now I can still cope and pretend it never happened. Yippee!

Thesis II: The islands don't use money.

I hosted a poll on this subject a few weeks ago, in which I learned that most people think there's money on the islands. Allow me to argue otherwise!

The most common theory for the origin of money is that it came into existence because bartering for stuff fucking sucks and nobody likes doing it. Nothing has a standardized value, so if the guy in your village responsible for making shoes is a pompous asshole who makes ludicrous demands such as asking for FIVE bushels of wheat in exchange for a pair of shoes, even though you've heard the guy in the next town over only asks for three bushels, then you're shit out of luck and have to fork over all your wheat. Maybe the shoemaker is on a gluten-free diet and refuses to trade with you, so as a wheat farmer who only trades in wheat now you can't even barter for a new pair of shoes! Sucks to be you, buddy.

Under a monetary system, a bushel of wheat and a pair of shoes both gain a standardized value. A bushel of wheat is $1, and a pair of shoes is $4. After selling enough wheat that you have $4 in profits, you can walk over to the shoemaker, slap some coins down on the table, and tell him to get to work. Now, you might say, "wait, if you're in a captive market, can't he just charge whatever he wants and you have to deal with it?" The answer to that question is yes, but asking economic theorists to consider greed in their theories is a bit hard since they don't really care about fairness at all and still don't understand what's wrong with kids making carpets in factories since their hands are the perfect size for that sort of thing. All these stupid labour rights activists don't understand comparative advantages and it's sickening!

Here's the problem with an existing Mobian monetary system: it assumes greed! Or, at the very least, assumes that Mobians have normalized the hoarding of commodities for personal gain. I don't believe this is the case at all.

Let's recall Zik's statement to the Zeti: Mobians don't steal from each other because they are kind and compassionate to one another. I would argue that the origins of property/commodity ownership implies large-scale theft, as developing something like an apple orchard requires dispossessing your neighbours of a plot of land and claiming it for yourself. Then you grow a ton of apples on your land--that they once could have used as they pleased before you took over--and tell them that they can't eat any of these apples unless they give you something in exchange. But the apples are right there, bro, they'll complain. You can't eat all of those on your own. You'll tell them to suck it up and eventually they'll bring you items (or money) in exchange for some apples.

This doesn't seem like something we'd see the cute Sonic furries do to each other. Since we're talking about farming, here's a panel from there IDW 2022 annual where all the characters are helping out on some kind of communal farm:

Moving on, let's look at why Sonic hates Eggman so much. Eggman has always served as a representation of industrialization, environmental exploitation and degradation, and individualist greed. If the islands had a monetary system, and the ideals required to develop one in the first place, then a lot of what Eggman is attempting to implement would have already existed! Economic development requires exploitation, both of other people and natural resources. Money is the result of economic development. It just doesn't fit for me.

Thesis III: Equity as a norm.

This is basically the section on culture. Leading up to this section, I've established a rule: Mobians live in a stateless and moneyless society. Here are some cultural norms that might have lead to such a society in modern times.

Ecology as a priority. This is consistent with the environmentalist themes in the series, but also with the way that most Mobians we meet in the series seem to really care about the environment. My personal take is that they simply haven't developed the view that they are above nature, which is something seen in Eggman and other industrialists. In Sonic Prime, we see Thorn Rose react aggressively when she notices that her friends harming plants by taking more than they need from them. This may have been because they violated a strict cultural norm! Although this occurred in an alternate dimension, I like to think about its implications for the main universe, too. Is the cultural pressure to maintain and protect the land they live on enough to suppress industrial development? Maybe!

Conformity as a means of social cohesion. Generally, I think Mobian society demands a lot of personal sacrifice from people. A core tenant of collectivism is that you have to put up with not getting what you want most of the time, and sometimes this even comes at a direct cost to you. Maybe your neighbour stole your favourite toy truck and you can't complain about it or everyone will accuse you of trying to establish private ownership over something stupid. Or, maybe, there hasn't been a lot of rain this year and your communal farms are flopping. Out of desperation one day, you wander into the woods and find some bushes of edible berries that could help you survive better for the next few days. However, since eating while your neighbours starve would violate the ethical values imposed on your by your collectivist society, you must accept only having a few berries instead and sharing the rest with your village. If you're someone like Tails, who stands out because of a physical mutation, then tough luck if your village cares about appearances. Everyone knows your business and you're dependent on them for support. As soon as they decide they don't like you, you're going to suffer severely. Upsides and downsides to everything.

Alternate methods of punishment. A society without a state likely wouldn't have prisons. Building on the concept of conformity, social crimes would be mitigated through social pressure--basically, if you do something wrong, everyone will be mean to you and not like you as much as they did before. Fear of risking the judgment of peers is a very strong deterrent for most crimes, arguably moreso than prison itself.

Everything I've written here is my basic take on Mobian culture and society! In terms of holidays, I'm sure they have stuff relating to harvest times and seasonal changes.

Thanks for the question!! Sorry if this isn't what you wanted at all haha.

[weirdmageddon]

i hope this isn’t weird but, i just wanted to say i really really love this post you made, it’s so perfect for my very weird interest in historical homestuck… i wish there was a post like this for basically every homestuck update T^T or at least the big ones

its so tragic that a lot of the True Experience of homestuck (the fandom conversation with the comic) is basically lost media now… i wish i could have experienced it so bad. i’m so very tuned in if you ever have more stories to tell

of course! that makes me so happy to hear! not a definite solution but i will tell you that many blogs used the #upd8 tag so if you find an old blog that posted about homestuck before it ended you could try searching that tag. or, since tumblr's search is broken, just adding /tagged/upd8 to the url. or /tagged/upd8/chrono to go from from oldest to newest.

it really is such a shame. i can only hope i'm doing my part getting the conversation juices flowing again in this space by just sharing whatever's occupying my mind homestuck meta related..which i think passively deepens people's knowledge about the comic, the characters in the comic, the interactions between the comic and the fandom. though but i'm never confident of how much of an impact it's making. even when people tell me my influence is felt everywhere i feel like i dont hang around long enough to really feel it. i just dump the ideas ive thought on for a while (things that people need time to think about and consider themselves but i already went through all the motions of that by the time i share it) and move onto the next topic to rotate in my brain for as long as it takes, repeat ad infinitum. but asks like these make it all worth it i think. if people get genuinely moved or excited or interested in what i talk about as i am that's literally all i need to know to make it feel worth it

[e-vay]

Evay QA Bulk Post 5

Here we go again! These do not include Domino or Phlox questions as I plan on addressing those in a separate post. I couldn't get through as many questions this time around but I did what I could. I'm sorry, I'm just a little mentally and emotionally overwhelmed right now so I can only respond to so many at a time.

Thank you all for reaching out ☺️ Despite my brain, I am always very appreciative to hear from you!

PERSONAL ASKS

sayain-princess-vegenta asked: What is some original artwork or stories you've been working on lately? I know you probably get a bunch of questions for established fandoms but spoil us with your own thoughts! 😇

A: Well that's very kind of you to ask! To be perfectly honest, I mostly stick to fan art or creating original characters that exist in an already established world. I only have one personal project that is completely original, but so far it's only character designs. I don't have a full story or world built yet. I'm not sure if I'll ever share it on here.

Anon asked: Who or what made you wanted to do art?

A: There wasn't anyone or any particular thing that made me want to draw. I've just been drawing since I was able to grasp a pencil (or crayon) in my hand and I've never stopped! 🥰

Anon asked: Have you ever caught someone stealing or drawing your art?

A: Ohohoho, allllll the time

-

MISC SONIC ASKS

Anon asked: Do you still like sonic boom or are you over it?

A: My love is everlasting!

Anon asked: Hello Evay_art I always wonder have you always thought doing Amy Rose game???

A: Hi! Do you mean for me to make an Amy Rose game? I don't have the talent to do that, but gosh do I want there to be an Amy game so badly! ☺️ She deserves it! I would love to play a game devoted to her. I thought The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was especially great because she was a major character in it!

Anon asked: What is your opinion of Sally Acorn? Do you like the idea of her and Sonic have had a relationship? In fact, something I never got an answer for, is she considered canonical?

A: I'm not a fan. Plenty of people can argue for or against Archie characters, but Archie is not considered part of the game canon like IDW is.

Anon asked: I keep on hearing everyone talk about Hell Hath No Fury, so I finally got curious enough to read it! I have to say that it was coming out really good! Do you plan on working on it again any time soon?

A: Thank you for checking it out! I'm glad you were enjoying it. Yes I do plan on picking it back up eventually.

Anon asked: Does HHNF take place in Sonic Boom(Sorry if this is a stupid question)

A: It's not a stupid question at all. HHNF is a Modern Sonic story, not Sonic Boom. Also, it is not part of my AU. It's a completely separate story 🖤

fungus101 asked: Can you do more Werehog stuff

A: Oh I plan on it! I love drawing werehogs!

Anon asked: I have a question since sonic boom has been over for a while now. Do you still like the designs from it or have you moved on? Cause I know the sonic boom designs are somewhat of a future designs for some of your comics. I was just wondering if it would be Recon at this point

A: I still love the Sonic Boom designs and they're still part of my canon. I try to draw more than just Boom (I've been especially neglectful of the Modern designs and I need to do a better job of that), but the Boom designs are still my most favorite to draw.

sonicx1027 asked: Hey Evay, I’m curious if you are going to make another comic in the future, especially with the new Sonic Characters being added from the IDW series. If you are, have a story in mind?

A: I definitely plan on including IDW characters in future comics! I need to catch up on the IDW comics before I feel comfortable enough to write anything. I want to make sure I keep them as in-character as possible. But in the meantime I do have plans of having them make little appearances.

itsyourboysworld asked: on a scale of one - ten how made are you that we still don’t have a trailer for sonic the hedgehog 3 because for me it’s infinite

A: WHY ARE THEY TORTURING US?! GIVE US A TRAILER!!!! I am sure it will be worth the wait but it's killing me.

Anon asked: How do you feel about Mighty the armadillo?

A: It's funny because I think one of the Tailstube videos (or perhaps it was one of the Twitter takeovers) made the point that Mighty is basically just a more mellow version of Sonic and I do agree, I've always thought that. I actually think he's like a fusion of Sonic and Knuckles, but super chill.

-

MY OCs/AU ASKS

emceevoices asked: In Boom Baby, what was the movie Sonic, Amy, and Eggman were watching? In my dub, I had them watch the 93 Super Mario Bros movie, but did you have any specific movie in mind?

A: I believe you're talking about Chapter 5.1 of My Gal. They are watching my own make-believe Overwatch movie lol I just wanted an excuse to draw Mercy as a Mobian

toonfan91 asked: Oh my gosh I thought your tumblr was dead, as a fan of your work it is stellar seeing new Sonic art from you again, or art at all really. I do have one question, if you were to have the time and willingness to, would you draw designs for the Freedom Fighters (Sally, Bunnie, Antoine, Rotor and Nyx) that fit in your AU and try to work them subtly into it?

A: I'm still alive! Haha 😄 Thank you so much, I'm really glad you are enjoying my new work! I'm sorry to disappoint but I was never a fan of the Archie comics or characters, so no I do not include them in my AU. Sorry!

milangakokoros asked: Has pensado dibujar a whisper y tangle como si fueran parte del AU donde Aurora existe? Como serian sus vidas? Dime que estarian casadas jajsjj

A: I do plan on adding Tangle and Whisper 🥰 I need to get caught up on the IDW comics to make sure I'm writing them in-character, but they will make an appearance in the near future.

furrylovergril495 asked: Also how old is Aurora? Ps I think she one of the nicest fan kids I ever since

A: Thank you so much, I'm so glad you like her! 💗 I don't like to include exact ages because I don't think Mobians age the same way humans do. Especially since SEGA has redacted the Sonic characters' ages. But for majority of my drawings, Aurora is the human-equivalent of about 20-23 years old.

Anon asked: can you draw super Aurora and tell me what abilities she has

A: 😊 I've drawn Super Aurora (aka "Aurora Borealis") quite a few times! [x] [x] [x]. She has all the standard Super Hedgehog powers (Flight, strength, invincibility, etc.)

thechosenflow asked: How does Metal sonic interact with Aurora? Are they friends or does Metal act as a guardian?

A: I've only drawn the two crossing paths once. I like to think that Metal Sonic is secretly in love with Amy, and so when Amy and Sonic get married he is pretty devastated. Maybe he gets his own Metal Amy and has his own Metal family??? 👀

Anon asked: So we know that Sage is best friends with Aurora but how is she with Rouge and Knuckles son's? I forgot their names😭

A: That's okay, I have a lot of characters. You're asking about Ruff & Tumble! Honestly I don't see her having much of a relationship with them. They are quite a bit younger than Aurora so I don't think Sage would have much reason to be around them often. HOWEVER! I do write Sage to have a friendly-competitive relationship with CC, and since CC does not care much for the hyena boys, that means Sage automatically gets a kick out of them.

antooogamer asked: What happened to Sonic's scarf? Do you keep it or when you retire will you give it to one of your grandchildren?

A: With how much danger that hedgehog gets in to, that scarf would have been ripped to shreds! No way it survived long enough for his grandkids to have it 😆

Anon asked: Have Aurora ever met Blaze, Sliver, and Amy's parents?

A: Blaze and Silver are friends with Sonic and Amy so she definitely would have met them at some point. I originally wrote Amy's parents as having passed away before she and Sonic got married, but I recently decided to change that! The Rose 'rents will be alive in my canon! So yes she'd have met them, too!

cyberdiesel asked: What is Aurora's relationship with the Gogobas and Froglodytes (including Og) like?

A: Aurora does not have any relationship with them (I did not care for them so I don't plan on ever drawing them haha)

Anon asked: What did Sonic and Aurora do for Amy on Mother's Day?

A: They spoiled her rotten by making her the most delicious, sweet, unhealthy breakfast imaginable with pancakes and ice cream and all the flavor syrups! Sonic even cleaned up after!

Anon asked: Does Aurora loves Chillidogs like his father?

A: Nobody loves chilidogs as much as Sonic haha But she does enjoy them. She kinda has to, chili dogs are a staple in the Rose household!

medi0creartz asked: There’s something I’ve been thinking for a long time. I don’t know if someone asked you this but has Cream and her Mom Vanilla ever meet Aurora?

A: Of course! Cream is Amy's best friend. Aurora absolutely would have met her!

echidnapower asked: So, difficult philosophical lore math question for you. 👀 Aurora and Sage are besties. Aurora is the daughter of Sonic the Hedgehog. Sage is Dr. Eggman’s daughter. Dr. Eggman wants to destroy Sonic and take over the world. Sage never wants to hurt Aurora. Eggman hurting Sonic would hurt Aurora. Sage is "presumably" loyal to Eggman. Solve for X, if you know what I mean. >:)

A: echidnapower you always ask the tough questions! It might not be very exciting, but Eggman mellows out in my AU as he gets older and he even adores Aurora, so he has no intention of hurting her. Sage does want to rule the world and make the Eggman Empire reign supreme, but she wants to do it passively and by intelligent means, not through destruction ;) Sorry that's a boring answer for you!

km0901 asked: Hi again! A question that's been on my mind lately comes from your "Time travel" comic. In it, we know that Aroura goes back in time to save Shadow, but from what? I first thought it might be DR. Eggman, but he has seemingly moved on with his life along with everyone else. This leads to the big question, who or what is this new menace?

A: I know this is a disappointing answer, but I can't reveal what the threat behind that storyline is yet! You'll have to wait when I can finally write that story out as a fic. All I can confirm is that the threat is invented by me. It is not an antagonist from the game canon. I'm so sorry I can't share more!

Anon asked: will you ever draw your human AUs for sonic again sense you have a newer art style ( btw speaking of art style i Love it and absolutely adore everything you post)

A: You are such a sweetheart, thank you! I'm really happy to hear that. I'll draw human Sonic characters again, just not sure when :) Some people really hate the way I draw the gijinka Sonic characters so that's why I don't do it much. But whatever, it is what it is. It's not going to stop me forever lol I'm happy you like it!

Anon asked: I love the design for Movie Aurora!! Since Tom and Maddie are like Sonic's adopted parents (if Aurora lives on earth), would you see Tom and Maddie show her tons of affection like grandparents?

A: Thank you so much! Yes I'm sure Tom and Maddie would be over the moon to have a grandbaby! I have the cutest vision in my head of them having to buy doll clothes for her since she's so little.

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

Anon asked: Now that i thought, have the Shadora Offspring ever met Black Doom? If they did what's their relationship with him?

A: The Shadora Horde are aware of their lineage [x] [x], but no they don't have a relationship with Black Doom at all. If Black Doom were alive, Shadow definitely wouldn't let him anywhere near his kids.

-

SHIPPING ASKS

aeroranger100 asked: What inspired you to make My Gal? Or maybe I should ask, what got you on board the SonAmy ship in the first place? 💙🩷

A: My Gal came about simply because I thought, if Sonic were to ask Amy out, how would it go? Although I love sappy romance and angst, I actually prefer writing comedies so I put it in the Sonic Boom universe because I could go super silly with it! Though, I still think their date might go sort of like the events of My Gal no matter what universe it takes place in 😉 As far as why I first started shipping Sonamy, it was simply by learning who Amy was in the first place! The moment I saw her and got to know her character I thought, oh, this girl is the one. I wrote a very detailed post about it a long time ago if you'd like to read it! It wasn't meant to persuade anyone, it was just meant to illustrate why I'm so passionate about those two!

Anon asked: Your Sonamy art always gives me life and I love whenever you draw them smooching😘😘 Question: Do you have any art of Sonamy making out? Or if you know of another artists could you point me to them? I'm having cravings!!

A: Thank you so much! Honestly I feel like I draw them making out all the time 🤣 The entire ending and Epilogue of My Gal is just them kissing constantly haha! I'm working on some birthday drawings that should satisfy that craving of yours 👀

Anon asked: Hope I’m not annoying but what are Shadow’s, Sonic’s and Amy’s orientations(sexualities)? I know you answered What are shadora children sexualities but I really am curious about this. Also,love your art💜🙌

A: You're not annoying and thank you for the compliment! Honestly I can only answer for my own characters because they are 100% made by me. Unless SEGA officially confirms what Sonic, Shadow, and Amy's preferences are then I can't say for certain. We can all just imagine what we want.

Anon asked: Are Sonic and Amy still an active couple when their grandparents? And what do you mean by active e-vay? 😏Plz explain if you want😊…. I’m very curious 😂

A: Anon, you are too funny. You can't ask me a question and then follow it up by "what do you mean" when it was your question! 🤣 Yes they're still very active, however you mean it to mean! 😜

Anon asked: Do you think boom sonic has feelings for amy as well?

A: Absolutely I do! He was so sweet on her in that show!

Anon asked: What if sonamy was a same gender couple?

A: I've said it before but I'll say it again: As long as they're together and they're happy, I'm happy!

Anon asked: hi e-vay what's ur fav sonamy universe?? (boom, prime, etc.)

A: Hi! Wow, that's really difficult for me to pick. Boom was definitely the most fun for me. That show made me laugh so hard and Sonic and Amy were both so handsome and pretty, and they were so funny the way they interacted. I am still 100% of the belief that they were secretly dating during that show!!! But Modern has the most potential. It can be fun and it can be serious, so if they ever wanted to take Sonic down a romantic path I think it would be more meaningful in the Modern context.

Anon asked: desearía tener más contenido tails x cc realmente los amo!!

and makarov asked: More cc x tails comics pleeeaseeee🥺? And will you do an cc x tails animation?

A: I'm so happy you like the LoveBytes (TailsXCC) ship! I promise I'll draw more in the future 💛 I'm sorry for the wait. I don't know about an animation but definitely more drawings to come.

nightfurylover31 asked: I’ve been listening to Backstreet Boys again to relive my childhood, and the songs “Shape of My Heart” and “I Don’t Wanna Lose You Know” feel like perfect Sonamy songs! 🥰💙🥰🩷

A: Backstreet Boys! Talk about ROMANCE! I love those and of course now I will associate them with Sonamy 🥰 Thank you for sharing!

blueberryydraw asked: hey e-vay! I love your works and I'm a big fan of Sonic. Would it be possible for you to make a Sonamy movie? :)

A: Thank you so very much! Are you asking if I could make a sonamy animation some time? If so, I can't say much about it but there is a very special project I'm working on! It won't be ready for a very long time, but when I can talk about it, I will!

ultimate-guardian asked: What do you say about Knuckles x Mighty?

A: I don't personally ship the two of them together

*The next question is a Shadora Ask. Skip if you don’t like Shadora

Anon asked: Sonic does not want Shadow to date Aurora cause he thinks he might hurt her or is it because they don't like each other?

A: It wouldn't matter if it was Shadow or not, Sonic doesn't want Aurora dating anyone. He doesn't think anyone is 'good enough' for his daughter.

–

Thank you all for the questions!

Evay QA Bulk Post 1

Evay QA Bulk Post 2

Evay QA Bulk Post 3

Evay QA Bulk Post 4

Evay QA Bulk Post 6

[dcfanfictioncatalogue]

hey i just wanna say ur blog is great and sooo useful!! do you have any good flashfam recs?

I am so sorry this took a month to answer -- the answer WAS no, but I have spent literally forever digging through ao3. this ask was also a little vague, as I am not the Most familiar person in the world with flashfam, but I tried my best. I'm sort of afraid you've already read all of these, but oh well. if you would like to send another ask in requesting a specific character or relationship pairing (platonic/familial/romantic) I would definitely be able to get that to you faster.

at the beep, by FromStarstuff ( @blackbatcass ). 5k, G, background wallinda. fic summary: voicemails from the flashfamily. my notes: CUTE!! solid fluff that still manages to be accurate to their characterization and dynamics, I had a very good time and genuinely laughed out loud at some points. this user has some more dc fics -- not all flashfam, but all VERY good.

&&

Iris West and the Multiple Resurrections of Eobard Thawne, by poppiesandsunflowers ( @wallylinda ). 10k, T, westallen/newsflash. fic summary: family bonding is when you bury the body of a time-traveler together, over and over and over again. my notes: like, this is obviously the ICONIC one by this user, but she has SO many GOOD fics so please click on the user link and scroll through the flash comics tag!! I didn't want to spam this rec list with just one user so I just picked one, but her writing is really so good.

&&

you aren't always the best, but you're mine., by lazarusfell ( @gretahayes ). 4.7k, NR, gen. fic summary: bart has known his big cousin for exactly thirty-five minutes and twelve seconds. in that time, bart's learnt two things. one: wally hates him completely. two: bart may as well do the same. my notes: MAN. bart and wally's complicated relationship!!!!! it's so hard to find fics that tackle this in a meaningful way and AURGH this is everything I love the characterization here

&&

One Step At a Time, by novakid. 18.7k, T, gen. fic summary: thaddeus thawne spends years imprisoned as a living statue until bart allen releases him and pleads a case for his reformation. my notes: thad-centric, but we get the whole flashfam as he tries to integrate himself into it, and mannn do stories about reformation always get me, I loved this one. plus this author has more flashfam stories as well !!

ask box is open for requests ++ find my fic rec libraries organized here

[queenofbaws]

hi queenie i find myself humbly at your doorstep again (if there was a bowing emoji i would put it here) so question! do you outline your stories? and if so, how? another writer i admire was nice enough to lay out a "tutorial" of sorts but i have so much trouble with the small stuff. like i have so many Big Moments planned and tiny tiny moments planned but the medium moments? do you have any idea on how to plan the medium moments???? i'm going crazy! 😩

(as always, your answer is appreciated and cherished)

why hellooooooo quill!!! what a treat to find you on my doorstep! please know it is i who is bowing and scraping - it's always a delight to be visited by THE hawke/varric queen! ;)c

extremely long story short: i do outline my stories! i live in constant awe of people who can write by the seat of their pants. alas, like the humble ant, i am always digging out pathways to follow later...usually the pathways are intricate. maze-like. bottomless. 😫 hehehe but i know E X A C T L Y what you mean, finding ways to connect everything can be...so much, especially when all you really want to do is get to those big, juicy moments, AHHH!

i'll throw my general process under the cut, and i hope it'll help in some way/shape/form!!! 💖

OH FUCK, I THINK I HAVE A FIC IDEA an outlining process by theicyqueen

hehehe okay, so as always, this is my general process, and what works for me might not work for others, so by all means take EVERY LAST THING I SAY with a boulder-sized grain of salt ;P

for the most part, my outlining process for oneshots and multichaps is roughly the same: (1) i get a central idea i want to expand on, (2) i write that fucker down in as much detail as possible, (3) i sit squinting at it like that kate beaton comic with edgar allan poe for a week or two waiting for a divine vision to hit, (4) profit. in all seriousness, though, this is typically my order of operations:

get the main idea down: this could be an overarching idea for a story (e.g., hawke and varric attend a fancy party and a murder mystery occurs) OR a big, juicy influential scene (e.g., incensed at hubert being an asshole, varric hurls a pillow at him and uncovers a secret door hidden in the wall!)

think about where you want to go from there: do you want this to be a oneshot? a multichap? how much MORE do you want to add to that main idea, essentially, or how far do you think you can stretch it?

get the biggest scenes down first: you know the ones. the ones you REALLY want to get to. write them down NOW. just trust me on this. WRITE THEM DOWN RIGHT NOW I STG!!!

if there are little scenes in your head, get those down too: don't worry about getting them down IN ORDER, just get them down! you think you'll remember them later: you will not. i love you. you will not remember them later. you're so smart. you will not. remember. them later. this is the writer's curse.

put those scenes into some sort of skeleton: here's where you start thinking about the order you want scenes in. where do you want those big, juicy things? where will your smaller moments fit in between them? what KEY POINTS need to occur before juicy scene b so it makes sense to the reader? what KEY POINTS will have to come AFTER juicy scene b to make sense? if you don't quite know where to put something yet, keep it separated, either in a separate doc, or just off to the side; don't touch it again until you have an idea of where it should go chronologically

look at what you have so far: sometimes, if you're lucky, the way to connect these pieces together will become apparent once you see what you already have laid out in one place. life is beautiful when this happens, but it doesn't always, so don't beat yourself up if you just CAN'T figure out how to get from point a to point h - let it sit. let it simmer. let it STEW. maybe eat some stew. it can't hurt.

consider the evil bits >:)c : what this means FOR ME is usually foreshadowing. is there some big twist you want to drop breadcrumbs for throughout the rest of the story? think about what that might look like! if you decide, for example, that you want to reveal a character was evil the whole time by the end of the story, think about what little nugget of foreshadowing you could insert sneakily into the beginning - a lot of the time tiny, almost insignificant details like this can help trigger bigger scenes in your head, "connecty" scenes, if you will. other examples of "evil bits," might be winks to canon material, easter eggs referring to other works of yours (or a friend's!), wordbuilding info that doesn't fit anywhere else, or not-so-subtle inclusions of your own headcanons that you have no earthly reason to include other than to make yourself smile (for example, in the project i'm working on right now, i'm making it a point to have travis hackett smell a girl's hair against her will! this is not a necessary detail by any means, but god help me my characterization of that freak will be known 🙃). it sounds fake, but seriously, sometimes the tiniest details can help you connect things later. the human brain is inscrutable.

determine whether you NEED to fill every gap: if you can't think of a way connect two scenes no matter how hard you try, it's ENTIRELY possible that they just don't need to be connected. at all. the reader doesn't always need to see characters move from one classroom to another, and we don't always need to see their skincare routine before they go to bed. those might be important scenes to include for what you're writing, don't get me wrong, but if they're not??? just...just skip 'em. DON'T connect the scene before and the scene after. if you're writing a oneshot, ask yourself: could i put a line break in here and just keep going? and if you're writing a multichap, the question is similar: can i just end the chapter here and pick up with the next one? sometimes you just don't NEED a medium-sized scene at all. just skip it!!!!!

talk to a friend who has no idea what any of this means: i'm. i'm so serious. if you're writing fandom stuff, please ask a friend with little to no knowledge of that fandom if you can talk at them about your story for a minute. if you're writing something original, please ask literally any friend at all if you can talk at them about your story for a minute. you will be. shocked. the words that come out of your mouth once you start doing this. shocked. sometimes there's stuff up in your brain you didn't even know was up there. i can't recommend it highly enough asldkjflakdjf

when in doubt, consider a humble "blanket paragraph:" i feel like...i feel like a lot of us...who got into creative writing...and who took creative writing classes...came to hate the simple blanket statement. but we shouldn't. we should love it. sometimes you don't need a scene at all - sometimes all you need is, "and then they ate dinner and watched some movies before bed." that's it. that can be your link. it can. i promise. i promise.

i really, truly hope that helps you in some way! or, if nothing else, kickstarts something in your own way of planning 💜

what a hobby we chose, huh? what a hobby. :P

[your-name-is-jim]

What a Kirk/Spock shipper sees in a Kirk/Female-Love-Interest story [PART 1/2]

[Part 2]

This is a pretty long post in two parts, so I hope you'll find it interesting. Don't worry, I shared a lot of pictures too! :)

First of all, what is it about?

An analysis about a 32-pages comic published in 2020 by IDW Publishing. More specifically, I'm talking about the Valentine's Day special from the comics series Star Trek: Year Five that I recommended here. The title of this story is Captains of Sea and War, and this is the official summary:

"James T. Kirk has had many loves during his mission among the stars, but this time he may have met his match in fellow Starfleet Captain Laura Rhone."

As I said in my review of Star Trek: Year Five, this Valentine's Day special is not linked to anything else in the main comics series. That means it can be read alone or, on the contrary, it can be skipped if you're only interested in the series (where Kirk doesn't have love interests, by the way).

Do I recommend this comic issue?

It depends on your preference! Just like the rest of Star Trek: Year Five series, the art is great and so is the characterization, at least most of the times. Jim is written as a romantic book lover and definitely not as a womanizer. However, if you only ship Kirk/Spock or you're not into Kirk romance with women in general, I believe you should avoid wasting your time and money. Just read my analysis if you're curious! :)

Why am I talking about this? And why as a Kirk/Spock shipper?

Good question. The short answer is that I read this comic and I have a lot of thoughts about it.

The long answer is that I love TOS Kirk and I'm interested in him as a character, romantic scenarios included. Since Kirk/Spock is my OTP, I can't suddenly take my slash goggles off, so I already knew before reading this comic that I'm not exactly the target audience and nothing is ever going to convince me that Spock isn't The One for Kirk. However, it was an interesting reading in multiple ways, so I'd like to say why!

I want to be 100% clear about my Kirk/Spock preference because even if I will try to talk objectively about the comic to a certain degree, this analysis is biased; if you don't like Kirk/Spock, this is NOT the post for you. That said, you may not see the point in a K/S shipper writing an analysis about a romance between Kirk and a female character, but… well, unless someday they'll release official Kirk/Spock comics, this is all we have.

There are two reasons why I read this story despite being pretty much a monoshipper when it comes to Kirk:

I had already read the main comics series and I liked it a lot, so I wanted to give this special a try.

I thought it was probably going to be okay, because in my headcanon Kirk and Spock don't actually get together until The Motion Picture. Kirk has a lot of love interests before that movie, so adding another one doesn't really bother me. It turned out (as I'll mention later) that I wasn't completely right about the era, but I take Star Trek comics as "extras", so I just ignore what I don't like.

Note: this analysis contains SPOILERS from the entire Valentine's Day special.

However, it does not contain spoilers from the main Star Trek: Year Five comics series. So, if you're planning to read that one, you're safe here! Just avoid this post if you don't want spoilers about the Valentine's Day issue.

Okay, are you ready? Let's go!

So, Jim is on shore leave with Bones. As you can see, the moment a pretty woman gets close to them, Bones leaves, because he's a great friend :)

We already know from the summary that the woman who talks to Jim is Captain Laura Rhone. Now, I'm already going to stop here to take a moment to at least appreciate the creators' effort: as someone interested in fictional writing, I must admit that creating a Valentine's Day special in 2020 about James T. Kirk finding love is an extremely hard task, to put it mildly. Seriously, if it can't be Spock (or the Enterprise :P), how the hell do you even do it? Are you going to give Jim another woman-of-the-week who's going to die? Another blond white woman? Another woman who forces him to choose between her and his ship? Or, on the contrary, a woman who'll choose for him and break up because she knows he wants the Enterprise?

NO.

Star Trek TOS was made in the 1960s, but we're in the 2020s now. Fans are tired to see always the same tropes with female love interests, and some of those tropes are just very outdated. So what does this comic do? Well, first of all, fixing what didn't work in Turnabout Intruder. Oh, let me get this straight: overall, I like Turnabout Intruder. I love the canon bodyswap, and I lost count of how many times I quoted "You are closer to the Captain than anyone in the universe" in my Kirk/Spock fan-fictions. However, there's no way that in the 2020s we're going to believe that a positive future means this:

In the Valentine's Day comic, Janice Lester still exists (she's mentioned once in a dialogue), but since Laura Rhone is a very good Starfleet captain around the same time, I believe we're now supposed to think that Janice was one crazy person who was never going to become a captain because of her personality and behavior, not because she's a woman. This is actually how I've always liked to mentally re-write this part of Turnabout Intruder in my head, because that's how I want to imagine it.

Anyway, back to the comic. Captain Laura Rhone is on shore leave too; she recognizes Captain James T. Kirk and she decides to introduce herself to him. She's very straightforward about her interest in him, so we immediately see that part of her personality.

Of course, the two captains can't enjoy their shore leave until the end. I'm posting this part to appreciate Bones in his beach clothes and Laura's very loyal Andorian officer who slips ("Laura! I mean, Ma'am!") when she sees her Captain in danger and oh whoops now I ship them. She doesn't remind me of anyone, I don't know what you're talking about.

Anyway, wrong ship. I'm obviously not following what the story is trying to tell me, because this is what happens next:

Just a moment to appreciate sleeping Jim. Cute.

So, after that night together, Jim and Laura don't see each other for 6 months. They meet again when the Drake, Laura's starship, has a battle against a group of space pirates and the Enterprise intervenes without consulting Laura first. Laura and Jim have a slight fight about that, but Jim apologizes, and it ends with them in bed again.

After that, because Jim is a romantic man, not a womanizer, and thank goodness the creators of this comic know, Jim asks Laura on a date. As they're walking together on a planet, Laura points out that they're doing things in the wrong order. Jim's reply is rather interesting: he asks her if they need to know what they're doing, and if there has to be a shape or a meaning to it. It's the first sign that even if they're both obviously attracted to each other, Jim is unsure about the kind of relationship he wants with her. When I think about his previous experiences, I believe it makes sense. He may be a romantic at heart, but he suffered so much for love that I can see why he's trying to be careful. There's also another reason, more related to the time this story takes place, which is a few months before the end of Jim's five-year mission. We see it here:

Ah, yes, a typical first date conversation: what Spock talks about. Well done, Jim. Saying "a friend of mine" doesn't make it less obvious; I did my Star Trek homework and I know you're quoting the basis of Vulcan philosophy to her :D

(Of course, now I won't stop imagining Jim casually mentioning Spock during every single date he has with someone… That would explain why his love stories never last…)

On a serious note, as I was working on this analysis I realized something extremely interesting about the context of Jim's lines. Jim is mentioning IDIC when he's questioning his future as a starship captain. He remembers that Spock talks about Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations, but Jim can only do one job. However, what will Spock tell him someday, right next to an IDIC flag?

Now, I don't know if the people who worked on the Valentine's Day comic really thought about this, but I think it's still, well, fascinating that Jim is using Spock's words to think about his own future, but he's following the wrong direction. I believe it's also worth pointing out that Spock will tell Jim that commanding a starship is his "first, best destiny" years after finding his own place in the universe. On the contrary, during the time this comic takes place, Spock is busy with his own inner distress.

Anyway, that's enough Spock for now. Back to Jim's first date with Laura…

So, I started this analysis with a question: how the hell do you write a love story with TOS Kirk in 2020? This is the way this comic tries to answer: you create a female character just like him.

Okay, they look cute together. Laura loves being a starship captain! She loves reading! And dancing! And climbing!

Wait, wait, wait. I appreciate the inclusion of Jim Kirk's canon hobbies. I really do! But aren't we forgetting one?

This is interesting. Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but this makes me think that they didn't want Laura to have something in common with Spock. Spock is the character who plays chess the most in TOS, so I can see why the creators of the comic didn't want the readers to think about Spock instead of thinking about Jim's girlfriend. That would be too bad, huh? :)

There's also horseback riding missing, but that doesn't appear until the movies, so even if I personally believe that a farm boy like Jim learned how to ride horses when he was young, I can see why they skipped it in this comic. It's also mostly associated to another love interest (Antonia from Generations), but if this is the reason they didn't want to show Jim and Laura riding a horse, I'm just going to think even more that the lack of chess is suspicious, and they're counting Spock as one of the "girlfriends".

On the other hand, since horseback riding is associated to starship captains in TOS and TNG (I don't know about the other Star Trek TV series because I haven't watched them yet), I think it would have been a good idea to have one panel with Jim and Laura riding.

That said, if I had to make a guess about the real reason the comic doesn't show horses… I'm a doctor writer, not an artist, but I believe that drawing horses can be a pain in the ass, so in this comic they just didn't bother haha

Anyway, back to the plot! As I said, Jim and Laura's personalities are very alike. Of course, that doesn't mean they're perfect for each other, but I admit that this premise made me curious when I read this comic. Let's find out if it works out!

I'm posting this picture because of the book Laura is holding: first of all, this is where the title of this story, Captains of Sea and War, comes from. But it's also important to remember the book. You'll see why in Part 2. :)

So, two months later, Jim and Laura trust each other as captains without even talking:

We see Laura's other friend, probably her first officer, trying to warn her, just as Spock does on the Enterprise. I'm taking a little moment to appreciate "Noted, adored, and ignored, Commander", because it's really sweet. Imagine Jim telling this to Spock :D

So, the captains are right, and everything is good, because…

Okay, okay, wait a minute.

Apparently, one of the good things of this relationship is that Jim and Laura make a good team together. They don't even need to communicate to understand each other during a mission. Now… I don't even need to put my K/S goggles on to say that Jim and Spock are canonically one of the best teams in Starfleet, if not The best team. You don't need to ship them to know how many times they understand each other without words in the series, how many times they make plans and just know what the other will do, how many times Spock hears/sees someone that should be Jim and just knows something is wrong, and so on. Of course, as a Kirk/Spock shipper, reading in a Valentine's Day special that making a good team is good for Jim's love life makes me happy!

"Yep. All that sex didn't go to waste."

Jim. Jim. Are you saying that you and Laura are a good team in Starfleet because you had a lot of sex? I'm not even going to say what this makes me think as a K/S shipper… Did I say that Kirk and Spock are the best team? :D

Okay, okay, maybe it's not the same. Because Spock is a man, and Jim isn't attracted to men… right?

Ahem. I lost my mind when I read this for the first time, and I'm going to lose it again.

"There don't seem to have been many ladies in your life. Gentlemen, either." "Well, I've been busy."

Now, let's be honest here: Laura's lines didn't have to be phrased that way. We know Jim likes women, so even nowadays nobody would bat an eye at "there don't seem to have been many ladies in your life"; and if you're the writer of a very heterosexual comic who wants to avoid K/S shippers like me thinking "hehehe, because Jim has a man in his life", you can still write something neutral like "there don't seem to have been many lovers/romantic partners in your life". Or just a generic "it looks like you haven't been on many dates lately".

Laura mentioning "gentlemen" explicitly can make some readers think that men are an actual option for Jim. (Me, I'm "some readers".) Sure, it's not a confirmation, but Jim doesn't deny it. He just says he's been busy. There is room for interpretation in multiple directions, but even if I put my personal preference aside, I think it's important to remember something: in context, in this part of the story, Laura knows Jim. We've seen in a previous panel that they've done a lot of things together. Laura is not a stranger who may say "you don't have a girlfriend… or a boyfriend" because they don't know Jim. Personally, I think it's very likely that Laura asks about ladies and then adds gentlemen because she knows Jim is bisexual with a preference on women. It fits my headcanon for him. (Of course, he can be into anyone, not just men and women, and he has a preference for women because hasn't tried dating Spock yet :D)

Anyway, the other thing that panel points out is that neither captain would give up on their own starship. Well, that's fair.

Okay, okay, I'll be serious: Jim sacrifices the Enterprise in The Search for Spock during an emergency. Of course, it's definitely not a coincidence in the narrative that said emergency happens because Jim is looking for Spock's body. However, we all know how much Jim loves the Enterprise and how bad he feels without a starship, so it's only fair that in normal circumstances, he shouldn't be forced to give up on his "silver lady".

Laura understands that they're the same, so...

This is another thing I appreciated! Who cares about gender norms, a woman can propose to James T. Kirk! :D

Now, just as I said about the "gentlemen" line, it's important to think about the context of this proposal. When the two of them are drinking together, Laura says "I've been asking around about you". That means Jim and Laura's relationship is still casual, to the point that she could have expected him to have flings with other people too. Honestly, this is just my opinion, but I'm not even sure I'd call it exactly an open relationship, because that would still imply a relationship in the first place. I'm mostly referring to the fact that Laura has been asking around about Jim's love life instead of just, you know, asking him? I believe that if they trusted each other and were in an open romantic relationship, either they wouldn't care about each other's partners or they would just talk about it. Since Laura wants to marry Jim and have an exclusive relationship with him, it makes sense for her to bring up Jim's love life. However, I can't really help side-eyeing that "I've been asking around".

Am I reading too much into this? It's possible, but this is another clue about their dynamic that I'll mention later in the story.

Sooo, Laura asks Jim to marry him. What does Jim answer?

Unfortunately, I reached Tumblr limitations of the number of pictures I can share, so… you'll find out in Part 2!

If you're reading my analysis for the Kirk/Spock shipper's point of view, I especially recommend the second half, because that's where things get more interesting! :D

I hope you enjoyed the first part of this analysis! Thank you for reading until the end! See you soon!

Part 2!

[xxplastic-cubexx]

sorry if you've already mentioned but what (re?)ignited your love of comics/x-men/cherik? curious because there are so many different adaptations of them

i think im gonna speak for a few (or a lot of) people when i say that TL;DR the wolverine x deadpool movie that came out this summer is what pulled me back into comics and i COULD leave it there but i will go into excruciating and unnecessary detail instead because i love an origin story and i love oversharing.

under the cut tho because im nice sometimes (there's also wxdp doodles in here. if you want to see that)

ironically (and probably commonly), growing up i was more of an avengers kid. Kinda. Loosely <- binge watched the cartoons and movies and read copious amounts of comics and fics and i am hoarding fanart in my old dresser as we speak ok 'loosely' is a modest lie.

embarrassingly i remember getting into discus cause of captain america LMAO so yeah needless to say i was a Humble Fan- me joining my school's comic class/club didnt help either (shoutout to my teach from that she was the realest one out there for. A Multitude of reasons). she definitely is was inspires me to even draw still and make comics and i often think bout the tips i learned from her class tbh she was great

back to the movies t and comics tho, i got into em because my brother would offer to take me and that's how we'd hang out (i rarely saw movies in theaters and i even more rarely went anywhere as a teenager. still kinda like that today tbh ooops) and yk. it just snowballed after that.

my brother and i have always liked comics- he just more than me for a while (though he still very much loves comics and As We Know From My Posts we still talk about them whenever i see him To An Exhausting Degree)

durin then i was really into stony and i have a few surviving doodles i made but those are between me and god. and anyone who asks tbh LOL

'snap can you make this related to x-men again this is long' ok so fast forward to This Summer again I Still Don't Really See Movies but my brother offered to take me and this was the first time i'd actually seen an x-men movie in full

as a kid i only remember seeing the 'perfection' scene between erik and raven in first class while i was channel surfing. pretty sure i changed the channel after seeing mystique naked cause i was scared my parents would get mad at me if they caught me watching it LOL

BUT MOVING ON As A Kid i think it's also natural you'll sometimes watch 92 if it's on And I Did though evidently it didn't stick too hard (i do remember really liking beast and gambit though.... still do really): my knowledge of x-men was. INCREDIBLY sparse. like diabolically so so i didnt have too much expectations (aside from the fact i vaguely liked deadpool beforehand).

tbh i dont know why my bro never took me to see any of the x-men movies. it's not like he doesn't Also like x-men (90% sure nightcrawler's his favorite but my brother will be caught dead saying he has absolute favorites like that)- he owns a bitch load of deadpool comics/omnibus sets too (of which ive read over the years and reread this year) but Shrug moving on

Much Like Most Of The Internet i fell down the rabbit hole that way. i have some doodles i made a couple days after seeing WxDP that i now have an excuse to throw at all of you Look And Perceive

and so. As I Do. i got curious and told myself i'd binge watch all the x-men movies the week before i went back to school And Then I Did ft. My Brother Sometimes and then i said i'd binge watch all of '92 and And I Did That ft. My Brother Sometimes But Less So and now we're here. currently watching Evolution...

once i got to school i realized i lived near a comic shop and started getting into the comics that way (the first ones i got since going down this rabbit hole was Magneto Was Right!, The Resurrection of Magneto, and The Trial of Magneto. if you were curious !!!!! clearly i didnt care too much about context i just needed to see My Guy jelvejlkvj i have no regrets and Evidently ive read more since)

i'm pretty sure what dragged me into cherik specifically was the fact i saw a clip of The Famous ending to 92 where erik's aghast at the notion jean even has to question his love for charles. i think that was what officially had me refocus my lens on them: not a single poolverine thought after that LOL (all the cherik posting i saw on twitter definitely helped too but that was the nail in the coffin for any other interests i had: i was locked into cherik and x-men in general now)

that clip specifically, i was surprised at the fact they- frequently even- have the x-men franchise say erik loves charles and vice versa so bluntly. even if it's not meant to be romantic, i fear im just a fan of how casually the word's thrown around with them two and i got tender bout it all. Then Yk. i just live for the drama. the hilarity even. the sincerity .... they make me sick if i think of them too long so im gonna end it here

before i go tho ironically enough, the first x-men issue i owned was This one (story a this is that while stuck in some wacko dimension charles accidentally gets himself trapped in logan's mind while utilizing his astral projection. if you were curious). pretty sure i got it for free with another comic set i got years ago since our old comic shop loved to do that, but it's poetic aint it. maybe ill doodle something referencing it..

i should probably look into finishing this arc someday im Dummy curious to even know how it started and how it ends.....

[marsbarsfrommars]

if you need to be mean (be mean to me)

star wars: the high republic | rated t | complete | 2,661 words | avar kriss & elzar mann, a little avar kriss/elzar mann | hurt/comfort, angst, little bit of fluff

summary

“Are you alright?” he asks then, his voice gentle yet heavy with concern. It makes her want to scream at him and break down crying at the same time. She chooses the former. “Of course I'm not!” she snaps, whirling around to face him with so much force she nearly stumbles. “Starlight is lost at the bottom of the ocean, along with Stellan and Maru and so many others, and it's all my fault!”

or, a continuation of their argument in sos #2

read

under the cut or on ao3 for better formatting

notes

I told everyone who asked me to write more elvar (I'm incredibly honoured by that btw) that it would definitely take a while, but it hasn't even been a week so now I look like an idiot, but at least I have this for you

this one is dedicated to everyone on tumblr and ao3 who commented/liked/reblogged/left kudos on my last fanfic. your support means the world to me and is probably the reason I was able to finish this so fast

unfortunately, this is not as fluffy as the last one, but I really wanted to write this because I feel like we don't talk about avar's trauma regarding starlight and stellan's death enough. she deserves to let it all out and receive the comfort she needs.

I need to be real with you for a moment, though. I struggle with perfectionism, and that makes me really insecure about my writing, and while I try to overcome it, I have managed to convince myself that this is actually the worst thing ever written in the history of fanfiction. initially, I didn't want to post it at all, but I'm trying to overcome my perfectionism because it's actually pretty hard to get anything done like this, so I have forced myself to post it anyway. that is actually not at all relevant to the fanfic itself, but I needed to get this off my chest. anyways, I hope this isn't as bad as I think it is and you actually enjoy it

what avar and elzar say to each other during the first argument at the beginning of this will probably seem familiar to you because those are direct quotes from the comic. everything after that is written by me only.

also, english isn't my first language, so please just ignore any grammar/spelling mistakes

content warning for survivor's guilt, loss of a loved one (stellan in this case) and description of the start of a panic attack, but it's not more severe/graphic than in the books

“I am going into Nihil territory. I will find their leaders and bring them to justice,” she said when they fought that afternoon, the anger clear in her voice but not fully masking the still-audible edge of desperation.

Elzar looked taken aback. “Wait, you're leaving? After I just told you…” he hesitated then, like he just realised something. “Is that why? Because of what I did?”

It wasn't; of course it wasn't; she would never dream of leaving him because he had made a mistake. Normally, she would have explained herself and told him that she wanted to leave because of her own mistakes, not his, but she was too shaken up to properly explain herself, and he continued talking almost immediately.

“Or… is it something to do with us?”

“I can't make important decisions based on us, Elzar. I am a Jedi,” she answered, already turning on her heel and starting to walk away from him. “And so are you.”

She left him in their tent and went to help with the relief efforts until dusk, when the Eirami disaster relief workers told her to go and rest. She protested, of course, but they couldn't be persuaded to let her continue helping them.

She debated checking on the other Jedi, but she couldn't bring herself to face them at the moment. Ultimately, she decided to walk back to the refugee camp, hoping that Elzar wouldn't be in their tent. Out of all the people here, he was the one she wanted to see the least.

When Avar opens the door to the tent now, it's empty, and she lets out a breath of relief. Maybe I really should rest for a while, she thinks, even though deep down she knows she won't be able to, despite her tiredness. Nevertheless, she strips off her torn and singed cloak and washes her hands and face at the small sink in the corner.

Someone placed water and a small pile of ration bars on the low table between the bunks while she was away. Avar unwraps a bar and takes a bite. It tastes like nothing, like it always does, but unlike so many other times before, she's not bothered by it this time; she has no appetite anyways.

She takes another bite and lets her thoughts wander, almost desperately trying to avoid thinking of Stellan and Starlight. Amazingly enough, she succeeds. Instead, her thoughts travel back to Elzar and the argument they had this afternoon, which is only a marginally better thing to think about if she really intends to rest.

I can't make important decisions based on us, Elzar. I am a Jedi. And so are you, she told him and she meant it, she still means it. They are Jedi, after all. They can't put their feelings for each other above the wellbeing of the galaxy. Not that he had asked her too; he would never. Both of them believe in being Jedi too much for that.

Deep down, she knows that her desire to leave has nothing to do with them at all, and everything with her not being able to face her own failures. But it's easier to not think of that right now. Instead, she reminds herself that there is no them—there can't be, not like it's supposed to be, because they're Jedi and because Stellan is dead. They are a constellation missing a star, a composition with one note crossed out, an ocean devoid of life. They are forever incomplete. And there is nothing she can do to fix that. She has failed them all.

The pain manifests as a physical ache in her chest, and it becomes harder and harder to breathe. Before, Avar had hardly noticed the panic building up inside her, but now it threatens to overwhelm her. She clenches her trembling hands into fists and tries to breathe as deeply and evenly as possible. This is not supposed to happen to her. She is a Jedi; she doesn't let her emotions control her. She's not supposed to be overwhelmed by them or feel like she might die.

Avar tries to push the panic away, but the harder she tries, the worse it gets. Theoretically, she knows she has to calm herself, but it's hard to focus on anything but the fact that she can hardly breathe. Every single one of her senses is solely focused on the panic, until she abruptly senses something else—she expected him to return at some point, but she didn't expect that point to come so soon and even hoped to be gone by then. The shock snaps her out of the spiral she was threatening to go down and lets her focus on her breathing until she feels the panic subside. It's still there, but it's less overwhelming now.

She feels Elzar's presence before she hears the door open. At least one thing is still the same. He pauses at the open door, and there's a moment where neither of them say anything. Avar thinks he might just turn around and leave again, but he doesn't. Instead, he closes the door behind himself and walks over to her, stopping a few steps behind her. “Are you alright?” he asks then, his voice gentle yet heavy with concern. It makes her want to scream at him and break down crying at the same time. She chooses the former.

“Of course I'm not!” she snaps, whirling around to face him with so much force she nearly stumbles. “Starlight is lost at the bottom of the ocean, along with Stellan and Maru and so many others, and it's all my fault!”

He doesn't seem taken aback by her anger. A part of her wishes he was, wishes he would shout back. He doesn't. His voice remains gentle when he shakes his head and says, “It's not, Avar. I said this earlier too, but you can't put all the weight on yourself. I know you blame yourself, but no one else does, I promise you.”

“And how would you know that?” Her voice is raised and full of anger, she's almost shouting. It's unnecessarily mean, she knows that. Elzar is just as hurt as she is, he doesn't deserve to be the target of her rage at all, but he's here right now, and the anger is simmering hot beneath her skin. She knows she shouldn't give into it, but she's afraid of what will be left once the rage is gone.

“I know,” he responds, still infuriatingly calm, “because everyone out there has made mistakes as well, and some of those mistakes have set something in motion that got people hurt in the end, but no one blames them for that. How could they? Making a mistake that gives people who want to harm others the opportunity to do so doesn't make you wholly responsible for the harm caused. Sometimes it doesn't make you responsible at all.”

He's right. She knows he's right, but she can't quiet the song of fault and failure the Force has been singing to her all day. It's as overwhelming as the panic had been before.

Elzar continues talking. “Yes, you've made mistakes that indirectly led to all this happening, but so did I, so did Stellan, so did the Council, so did the Chancellor, and so did lot's and lot's of other people. But in the end, it's the Nihil alone who blew up Starlight. They caused all of this. They are to blame for all the deaths and all the hurt.”

He still sounds calm, but there's a clear edge of desperation in his voice now. “I know it's hard to accept that no one else blames you, when you blame yourself.” He doesn't say, I blame myself, too, doesn't say, If you blame anyone but the Nihil, it should be me, doesn't say, Logically, I know what I said is true, but I won't stop thinking it's all my fault, but she knows anyways. Normally, she would try to comfort him, like he's trying for her now, but she is unable to comfort anyone right now, not even herself.

“But I need you to know that the galaxy doesn't blame you, Avar. I don't blame you, and I know that Stellan doesn't-, didn't… that he didn't either.”

And that's what makes her tip over the edge she has been so precariously balancing on. “You have no idea what Stellan thinks of me or if he would blame me!” She's definitely shouting now. “The last thing we ever did was fight! It's the only thing we've done the past year, and now Stellan is dead and I can't ever tell him that I'm sorry and that I didn't mean any of it and that he will always be my best friend and that I… that I…” her voice breaks, effectively interrupting her rambling outburst. She has to take a deep, shaky breath before continuing, only to find that she can't. At last, her voice has failed too. That's when all the emotions she had been so carefully pushing down finally spill over and she just breaks down.

Elzar is there to catch her. He takes two quick steps forward and wraps his arms around her. Avar allows him to pull her close and clings to him like a lifeline. She buries her face against his shoulder and starts sobbing uncontrollably. He holds her for what feels like hours and lets her cry for as long and as hard as she needs to, while gently caressing her back and occasionally stroking her hair.

Eventually, the tears stop coming, and her breathing steadies enough to allow her to speak again. She pulls away slowly, not enough to create any real distance between them, but just enough to look him in the eyes. Elzar’s been crying too, she realises. His face is stained with tears, and his eyes are just as red as hers probably are. She brings one hand up to cup his face and he leans into it like it's instinct.

Avar leans her forehead against his and closes her eyes. They’re so close now that they are sharing breaths. She can't remember the last time they've been this close to each other. She missed this; she missed him.

“I'm sorry I yelled at you,” she whispers, her voice hoarse from all the crying. “It's just… I miss Stellan. I miss him so much, and I can't stop blaming myself for Starlight and for never apologising to him.”

“It's alright, I understand. I miss him too.” Elzar's whispering too, his voice as hoarse as hers. “And I know that he didn't blame you—he would never. He wanted to apologise and make things right with you. He missed you, Avar, and he wasn't angry with you in the end.”

She had thought she physically couldn't cry anymore, but she feels the telltale pressure of tears behind her eyes return at his words. “If he didn't blame me, he didn't blame you either, El.” It’s the only thing she manages to say before she has to bury her face against his shoulder, as her body is once again wracked by sobs. Elzar is crying too, she can tell by the way he's trembling in her embrace.

She doesn't have to question if what he told her is true or not; he wouldn't lie to her, she knows that. She also knows that he believes what she told him. It makes everything a little better. Still, neither of them will stop blaming themselves. Starlight is still gone, and Stellan is still dead, and there is nothing they can do to change that. The grief is something they have to accept and work through, as is the Jedi way. And as much as each of them wants the other to be okay, it's not something they can offer one another. Elzar and her—they're as broken as the song of the Force and all they can do is hold each other so they don't fall apart. It's a painful realisation, but Avar is grateful for it nonetheless. It's better than the panic or the anger.

It's then that she truly realises how tired she is. Her body feels heavy with exhaustion, and she doesn't think she can stay on her feet a moment longer without collapsing. “I think we should try to sleep,” she tells him.

Elzar nods. “Yeah, we should. I can go and find another tent if you-”

“No,” she interrupts him firmly. She doesn't want to be alone tonight, not anymore, and she imagines he doesn't either.

“Alright,” he answers, and Avar can hear the relief in his voice.

They pull away from each other fully, and while she toes off her boots and takes off her belt, outer tunic, and gloves, Elzar strips off his cloak and washes his hands and face like she had done earlier tonight. He takes off his boots, belt, and outer tunic as well, but leaves his gloves on, which should strike her as odd, but she's too tired to even question it right now.

They sit down on the edges of their respective bunks, facing each other. After everything, the physical distance between them feels too far like this. It's something both of them know, but neither is brave enough to address in fear of overstepping the boundaries they've so carefully drawn up between them. It's not something Avar can deal with tonight, she decides. So she walks over to him, sidestepping the low table, until she's standing right in front of him and he's looking up at her. There is a question in his gaze, he doesn't dare assume anything. She cups his face again, this time with both hands, to reassure him and because she wants to.

“El,” she whispers his name. There's more she had planned to say, but all the words are wiped from her head when his hands find her hips. This doesn't need to be discussed; they understand each other just fine without words. He gently squeezes her hips before letting go and scooting back on the narrow bunk. She climbs in beside him. It's clearly not made for two adult humans to comfortably sleep next to each other, but they make it work. They lie down side by side, faces turned to each other, and Elzar pulls the blanket over both of them. They don't speak, both of them are too exhausted to have a conversation.

Elzar softly brushes his lips against her forehead in lieu of saying good night, and she presses her hand against his chest, right over his heart.

They fall asleep like this. Lying on their sides, facing each other, arms slung over waists and legs intertwined. It's a surprisingly deep and restful sleep considering the events of the day. For a moment, it feels like maybe they'll be okay after all.

In the end, though, that night changes very little in the grand scheme of things. Avar still leaves in the morning. She wakes before he does and slips out of his arms and the bunk as quietly as possible. As much as it hurts her to leave Elzar like this, she knows in her heart that she can't go back to Coruscant. She can't face her own failures, so she tells herself someone needs to be out there fighting the Nihil and runs, even if she hates herself for it a little.

(Six days later, the Stormwall goes up and she's trapped in the Occlusion Zone with no way home. Three hundred seventy-six days later, she finally hears Elzar's message and his words make her sob once again. Three hundred and seventy-eight days after she left him on Eiram, she steps into the Council Chambers in the Temple on Coruscant and he's there. It takes her three hundred seventy-eight days to find her way home, but she gets there in the end.)